The Chemistry of Love
by ScarletGypsy
Summary: Emma Swan has never had a crush, but when she takes her senior chemistry lab at Harvard, Emma finds she is head over hills for a certain coffee haired brunette. Five years later, Emma reminisces on their great love story and how she was able to woo Regina Mills. (Young Emma and Regina AU).
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I own nothing and all errors are my own.**

**A/N: This plot kind of just hit me. I hope you enjoy it. Reviews will be lovely. Happy reading!**

* * *

><p>Five years ago, when I was in college, I took my last chemistry lab with Dr. Wolfgang. Yes, his last name was Dr. Wolfgang. Kind of intimidating, right? Isn't just me? Don't answer that. It's rhetorical. You would also look insane if you did answer that since you are reading this. Back to Dr. Wolfgang, his name seems a lot more intimidating than the guy actually was. He was this older man that was tall and scruffy. A little meek. That's not a bad thing though. It's not like I said weak. Physically, his hair had long turned the color of ash. His face was that of an average 60 year old man on tenure at America's most prestigious school, Harvard. He had crow's feet around his hazel eyes, laugh lines around his mouth, and those deeply set thinker's wrinkles on his forehead.<p>

The days that he served as my college professor he always looked like he'd just rolled out of bed. Except he wasn't wearing just anything, which is characteristic of those who grab the first thing and go. At least that was my personal experience and in my freshman year of school I literally had that mastered. But this guy, he always had Ralph Lauren oxfords on, but they were wrinkled, had one button off, a stain, or a missing button completely. He actually looked like he was once presentable, or at least he had the wardrobe for it. Which means two things either occurred. He was once married, or he is married and with a wife that he knows is cheating. I was right about these sorts of things and still to this day I remain intuitive, don't forget that. Just better mark my words. Now when the day came and I overheard that he was going through a divorce my ego did not at all get a boost. I did not mentally clap for myself, because hello, how rude would that be, since this poor old man's life was in turmoil. I would never.

You may be wondering if I ever invested in paying attention in this class. I did. I am pretty smart. Every lab I would walk in five minutes early. I had a short walk from my Irish History class and thus always made it in no time flat to his class. I was usually the first one to take a seat next to a few other students. Every evening it was the same routine though, as if he was on repeat. He'd walk in fiddle with the laptop connector for his MacBook, wipe his glass repeatedly, and pull out his class attendee's list to be passed around. It was mandatory for him to take attendance. I never missed any classes, so I never worried. I guess you are now wondering where I am going with this? I ramble and I am rambling about my professor. Don't worry. This is not about how I fell in love with my professor, Dr. Wolfgang. Forgive me if and when I do start to ramble, like now. I, it's just, there are so many elements to this story and well this is the class that I met Regina Mills. My Regina. Don't get angry for me being possessive, but she is, in every aspect, my Regina.

It is just like yesterday when I met Regina and I would like to reminisce on every fine detail, if you would. I mean, I want to tell you this story as best as possible and have you relive it with me. If I could find the words to describe the musty smell of the room, and the plastic seats I would. Wait. Well. If you could see me, I just scratched my head and laughed at myself because that is exactly the smell.

Regina sat in front of me in one of those terribly colored orange plastic chairs for the first two weeks. We were two of a handful of students that together on Friday nights took lab with Dr. Wolfgang. For some ungodly reason, I was the poor soul who registered late and got stuck in the worst lab of the week. But, with that said, Regina was there and well hey, lucky me, huh?

Regina was also one of the other students that got into the class early. We just exchanged pleasantries and did not speak the first lecture. Let me tell you, chem lab was so long and boring, but ironically Friday's at 6 pm became my favorite day and time of the week. Because, god bless my lucky stars, I got paired with Regina Mills. It was marvelous. You wonder why? I got to spend three whole glorious hours watching Regina bite her lip, or watch that cute vein on her forehead pop out as she grew frustrated over simple equations, or how she would roll her beautiful mocha eyes when we had to pipet a solution for two hours straight. Yeah. That was a rough day in lab. I spent that time studying her every move and learning her mannerisms, or her quirks if you will. You see, now I sound strange and too observant. But, wouldn't you if you had just discovered what a first crush felt like?

I know, I know. First crush and embarrassingly so because I was a senior in college. Some of us are late bloomers, okay, so don't get all judgey on me. I just, you know, focused on school and sports in high school. Sure I kissed boys when I was younger. I even went on dates, to the movies, football games, and parties with my friends. I did the whole prom thing too. My mother and father had their camera's out and boy did they soak up me being in a silky green dress. Basically, you can classify me as your average high school student. For some reason, however, I just never had a crush. My theory is that I never had a crush before because I had yet to meet my Regina. My heart was waiting on hers. Forgive me when I get sappy. I can get cliché and I can get mushy. But you would too, if you were able to be with Regina Mills. I am the luckiest woman on the face of this earth.

This is our love story. From start to finish. Now let me be clear, love stories are not always happy. They come with great sadness, laughter, hard work, sometimes the spark grows dull, but most importantly love stories focus on one important thing and that is love itself. I will never stop loving my beautiful Regina and it all started one late night during our first official lab with Dr. Wolfgang and a stupid lab assignment on chemical reactions.

* * *

><p>"Girls, this lab ends at 9 PM. It is fifteen minutes past and I need you two to finish up the experiment and record your data and make conclusions. I suggest you figure out where this experiment went wrong and ask more concise questions next time if there is confusion. All of the other students have finished and have turned their assignments in. I am going to be over in the corner grading them while you two finish up. You can always come up and get me if you need help. That is what I am here for."<p>

The man turned and walked away. His shoes squeaking as he turned on his heel in the opposite direction of us.

Regina turned to face me with the big buggy goggles on, vein fully popping out at this point, "This is your fault Swan. If you would have just listened to me and not touched anything like I asked you we would not be here late and re-doing this experiment. Hand me the pipet and slide over. Just write down the numbers as I read them off to you and then I will calculate the solutions to the problems."

Damn, bossy much, but how incredibly hot at the same time. You could totally tell she was Italian, or Latina, or both. "Regina, I am not stupid, please don't talk to me like that. I can help more than just record the data."

"You know what Swan, I would believe you if you did not screw this whole thing up and now my evening is being cut shorter and shorter each second you stand their gawking at me like a buffoon."

My mouth was agape at this. She literally just said buffoon like it was an average word used in the English language. In case you were wondering, it is not at all normal. Instead of arguing, she did have a valid point, the longer I stood there the longer we were here. I did as she asked and we worked in silence. She only spoke when it was a number I needed to record.

Once we finished the experiment she on instinct reached for the graphing calculator and punched in the numbers and received an error message. Now, I stood back and let her do her thing, because god forbid I interrupt. She's almost as vicious as an angry Chihuahua. Okay, that was mean. She's more like a raven colored bull dog. She finally had received the third error message and I finally felt like I could be her knight in shining armor and tell her she's forgetting to square root the final number then divide by two. Simple mistake really. See, I'm smart.

"Regina, I think I can help." I pull out my own calculator and punch in the same numbers and show her the process of how to work the equation, square root the answer, then divide by two and bam. I got the answer. I then specify based on the elevated value that the results are not conclusive and that we needed more data to make an educated decision. It was a bullshit answer. I knew it, and she knew it, but it was still valid. We turned in our assignments and cleaned our work station. We tossed our latex gloves, washed the communal goggles, and hung up the lab coats. On the way out of the lab Regina turned to me, stopping me and even blocking my exit. She was short and tiny, but knew how to stand her ground that was for damn sure.

"Nice work on the final equation. I would not have been able to finish without you. Sorry, I got a bit bitchy. It's just, well it's been a long week and I am tired and wanted to let loose, per se. My best friend, Kathryn, was supposed to wait for me, to go out to a party, and left me because I ran late. So my Friday night plans are now non-existent."

Insert my inner white knight here. I even internally crack my knuckles because this is too easy. She basically invited me to invite her somewhere, right? "Well, I don't have plans. My best friends are out on a date and I don't intend on subjecting myself to being a third wheel to their absurd amount of PDA. It just gets gross and sometimes I even wish I had bleach for my eyes."

Regina laughed. God that laugh. It was paralyzing at first. I had never heard it before.

Let's take a step back, since I am all about describing the fine details. Regina's voice. It's husky and deep. Not like a man's. My Regina's voice was sexy and, god help me, it was a panties dropper.

"You're funny, Swan. I bet it can't be that bad. Who are your friends?"

Now, this is a pivotal moment for me. I can really assess the situation. Is Regina Mills gay, or not gay, that is the question?

"Well I don't think you know Ruby or Belle, but they have classes with you as well. Ruby is this tall, slender brunette. She's infamous for this red stripe in her hair. Don't tell a soul, but it's really a hair clip she puts in every morning. I know these things. It's a perk of being her roomie. I have all the insider's scoop." I wink and Regina giggles at my quirky comments.

"Belle, she's a bookworm. She volunteers at the Widener library. You can catch her on the top floor restocking the shelves. She's terribly short." I hold my hand up and gage Belle's height. It's only a few lower than Regina. She cut her eyes at me, "Are you trying to call me short?" She playfully smacked my arm.

"Not at all!" I lean back on my heels and put my hands in my back pocket. The ball was in her court and she did not appear thrown off that my two best friends were gay. Interesting, and definitely filed away in my mental file cabinet labeled, "Regina Mills."

"They sound like they make a cute couple. I am a little envious."

Dr. Wolfgang walked up, "Girls I hate to break up your little love fest, but I need to lockup the lab for the weekend." I roll my eyes. Really? Love fest. That's embarrassing because my face totally turned the shade of a flamingo. Damn.

Regina turns and heads out of the doorway into the hallway of the chem hall, in the science center. I stretch and scratch the back of my long blonde hair and say, somewhat nervously, "Regina, would you like to hang out with me tonight?" Okay I was nervous. So what?

She looks at me, questioning my question. She did that, she would question my questions, but at least I wasn't shot down quickly. That would have been mortifying.

"Depends, what do you have in mind Swan?"

"Well you tell me what are you in the mood for? Coffee at a hipster café, or a hipster beer at a hipster bar?"

"Why does it have to be hipster?" She laughed.

"It doesn't, I was only making a joke."

She smiled. "Let's do coffee at a hipster café and a grab a few beers at a hipster bar?" You see, this is the fun Regina. She had this wild streak, back in the day.

"Sounds perfect. Do you mind if we stop off at my apartment a few blocks away for me to drop off my bag and change? I have late classes, so I actually have my laptop and a few books in here?" I shrugged at the back pack on my side.

She nodded and followed me out of the science center and onto Mass Ave. We walked a few blocks and finally got to my apartment. We treaded up two flights to my front door. We walk in, and thank the heavens I recently cleaned and organized the chaotic 3 bedroom flat.

"So you like Led Zeppelin?" She asked with a raised eyebrow to the poster on my wall. This could swing two ways, she either loved or hated the band.

"Yup. My dad got me into the band when I was a kid. I actually like a lot of the older stuff. I mean new stuff is cool too, but I mean you won't catch me jamming out to Usher, or Nicki."

"I like older stuff as well. Most people these days like the new stuff, or the newer stuff that sounds like the older stuff." I laugh at her logic. It's true you know, new bands are trying to replicate similar tracks from the 90's.

We move past my living room and into my bedroom, which was plain and bare. I didn't have a lot to bring to college when I first moved in freshman year, which feels like a lifetime ago. I drop my back pack down on the ground and turn to my closet. I notice Regina on the corner of my eye make herself at home on my bed. She was fiddling with something. Fiddling is a sign of being nervous, or ADHD. I knew Regina well enough now to know that it was not the latter.

I pull out a hunter green ned long sleeve woven button down. It was totally a guy's shirt from Pac Sun, but it was so my style. In case I have not properly described myself, I wear a shit ton of flannels, button downs, basic tee's, and sweaters. I mean. I wear other things. But, you will never find me in a dress, or heels for that matter. I mean not at this point in my life. I just refuse to wear such things that make me feel uncomfortable.

I can still see Regina from the corner of my eye and you know, I could just walk to the bathroom to change, but what's the point in that? I like to have a little fun and dare I say, tease. I pull off my black basic tee and stand stock still in my gray bra. I heard a slight gasp from behind me. I know exactly what I am doing. I am attempting to figure out if my undressing evokes any sort of uncomfortable emotion from the brunette woman. Regina was not forthcoming with her sexuality, so I play coy and thus try to bring it out of her. A girl has to do, what a girl has to do to get a response to properly assess the situation.

As soon as Regina gasped I turned to face her, "What's wrong?" I mean obviously nothing was wrong. I just wanted to play the dumb blonde role for two seconds so she could see me half naked top up. Her eyes, for the record, bugged out of her head and focused on my chest. Her mouth was clamped shut though. I put my shirt on and painfully slow buttoned it down. Missing a button purposely, like Dr. Wolfgang normally did, except I knew Regina would point it out. She would not be caught dead with a slob in public.

"Uh, Emma, you missed a button." She pointed out. I look at Regina confused and then down at my shirt. Perhaps I was beginning to be too transparent?

Regina slid off the bed, licking her bottom lip, and stood in front of me undoing the buttons to my shirt. She held a straight face as she fixed the buttons and turned to walk out of my room, "Let's go Swan. I need caffeine and I definitely need alcohol."

This night would prove to be pretty fascinating.

* * *

><p>"I will have one medium latte with cinnamon on top, and whatever she wants." I motioned to the brunette mocha eyed girl beside me.<p>

The cashier turned and asked, "Do you know what you want or do you need few seconds?"

"No, I will have an Americano." The guy nodded and I pulled out a wad of bills from my pocket and pay him for our caffeinated beverages.

"Just have a seat and I will bring out the mugs shortly guys."

I nodded and rested my hand on the small of Regina's back and motioned for a small two person table off to the corner. White Christmas tree lights dangled in the window frame that overlooked the area behind the café. The mood lighting was spot and definitely hipster. Even more hipster with Imagine Dragons and Kodaline playing faintly in the background. It's almost too much.

"So Swan, what's your story." Regina eyed me with a curious smile.

"Well, uh, what do you want to know? I am an open book with nothing to hide. Ask away?"

"Just tell me about yourself. Like before college, during college, and now.."

"Well I am from a small town in Maine. I had two great parents, but they passed away the summer before college. It's tragic, but they were in a car accident and my dad died. My mother, well she was so heartbroken that she died a few days later. They were truly in love, so much that they refused to live without each other. It's cute now, but it sucked when I was 18. Let's see… I am total kill joy after that comment. I promise I will redeem myself. In school I was a huge geek and athlete. I loved track, I had good grades, recommendations, and was able to land a scholarship to come to school here. I am majoring in public health. Sounded interesting when I was a freshman."

I was interrupted, "Here is one plain latte with cinnamon on top and an Americano."

The barista turned and left and before I could continue she fired off a new question, "So did you have any siblings?"

I shrug, "No. I was an only child." Regina looks at me and then asks, almost hesitantly, "What do you do when school lets out for winter and summer vacation?"

"I normally hang around campus in the winter. It's really pretty under the snow. I stay here in the summer as well and work at this cute hipster café. I tend to keep to myself mostly when I am not with Ruby or Belle."

"So you aren't dating anyone?"

There it is. She was curious. I like where this is heading. "Nope. I've actually only ever been on a few dates since I've been in college. They all sucked, so I stopped going on them. The girls all seemed too into themselves. Too prideful, or too hippy. It was always one or the other. "

Regina bit her bottom lip. Her mocha eyes piercing through me. Yup. She digs me. I knew it. She's totally into me. Nice, Swan.

"How about yourself?"

"My Readers Digest life story, or my relationship status?"

I smile, she was cute and feisty, "Both."

"Well, I am also from Maine. My mother is a mayor of a town outside of Bangor. My father passed when I was young, from a heart attack. I never played sports in school, but I rode equestrian. I was number one in my class out of 1,000 students in my senior class. I got into school with flying colors. I love it here. I immediately knew that I wanted to be a cardiologist. Ever since my dad passed, I just wanted to be on a team of scientists finding innovative technology to help save lives. So here I am and that is why I am in your chem lab. As far as relationship status goes, freshman year I had a boyfriend, Robin, but I broke up with him after… (hesitates)… I realized we just were not compatible."

"I am sorry about your father, that's terrible Regina."

"Well, hey, you are without two parents in general so, who am I to complain?"

"Yeah, but I had them until I was 18 and it is kind of endearing how they left this world so in love. So you said you and Robin were not compatible. Why's that?"

She sighed and looked me in the eyes, "I got super drunk one night and made out with someone else and I realized my feelings were not in the right place. He was the perfect guy, perfect hair, funny, smart, and loved me. He honestly loved me. You know, I even loved him too, but it just wasn't meant to be. I technically cheated and I realized that since I kissed someone else that I clearly did not share the same feelings. I haven't dated since. Not because I haven't been open to it, but because I just can't find someone who fits what I am attracted to."

I took the last sip of my latte and wiped my stash off my upper lip and smiled, "Well, Regina, someday you will find what you are looking for sitting right in front of you. Sometimes love just happens to find itself. Kind of why I gave up the whole dating sites and stuff."

Regina winked at me and finished her Americano and stood up with her mug and put it by the other discarded dishes. "Let's get those beers you promised me and this time I pick the place." I followed behind her out to the street front of the café. She put her hand in the air and called a yellow cab. "59 JFK Street, please?"

"Regina we could have walked that, it's only 15 minutes from here?"

"I know, but you were cold and I didn't want you to have to walk if you were cold." I smirk, she cared and it was adorable that she noticed I was cold.

* * *

><p>"What can I get you ladies?"<p>

"I will have four tequila shots and then one screw driver and whatever she is having." Regina slapped down her credit card.

"Whoa, killer think that is enough shots?"

She laughed, "Don't be dumb, two for me and two for you."

"That's more like it." I turn to the tattooed male bartender, "I will have two more tequila shots and a Sam Adams Lager."

In no time the bartender had 6 shots and our two beverages on the counter.

"So here's the thing Swan, three shots for me and three for you. But the person that fails to drink them the quickest has to do a dare."

I laugh, because really? I mean Of course I will win. I drink all the time and here is this cute small thing trying to race me. She's got balls. But not balls of steal.

"Challenge accepted Regina."

"On three. One, Two, Three…"

Our shot glasses were up in the air and my god, I lost. That thing, that woman I mean, sucked the shots down like it was water. I underestimated her by a long shot.

Laughing, "I knew you would think that you could beat me." She seemed to giddy about this. Great, her ego boost just went to her head and I will never live this down.

"So Regina, what is it? Are you going to dare me to run outside naked? To kiss a bunch of guys, or yourself?"

Her face turned red. I bet she never even thought that far ahead. "Well, you have presented me with some fabulous options, but I think that…"

I cut her off, "So you think that me kissing you is a fabulous option?"

She looked at me. For once I could not read her expression. I step forward. She doesn't step back. What is the worst that could happen I mean all she could do was say no? I could blame the alcohol and we move on, right?

But here's the thing. I can't read her expression. She's utterly speechless and I just want to kiss her. So I do.

I step forward and embrace her smaller frame and pull her closer to my body. My hand pulls her face closer to mine as if in slow motion, but trust me it all happened too quickly for my liking. Her pouty red lips intertwined with my chapped thin pale pink ones. She was so soft. My hands soon ran through her raven locks. Her hair felt like silk in between my fingers. Her lips moved in sync against mine, and she never once pulled away. But then, she did just that. Her eyes locked with mine and then she was gone.

* * *

><p>Like I said, every love story takes hard work. That day I was left in a bar with a tingly sensation on my lips, my head spinning, and my heart doing flips baffled at the situation entirely. Regina Mills left me at the bar just like a buffoon. Her word to describe me, not mine.<p>

**So, let me hear your thoughts? **


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I own nothing and all errors are my own.**

**A/N: I wrote a ton of this so far and will post a few more updates back to back. Consider this my Christmas gift to you.**

Looking back, I now realize that I was completely pretentious that night after our chem lab. In case you need some nifty tips on dating, a simple rule to follow is never kiss on the first date. My friend Ruby once said, "Never put out on the first date." So, clearly I did not note to self on her advice. Please, for my sake, note to self my advice based off my unfortunate experience. You know what, if not more important than my first rule, based off Ruby's advice, know if you are even actually on a date. Back in college, I often blurred the lines between a date verses just hanging out. I was a kid, dumb at times, and in respect to my first, let's just call it an 'outing' with Regina would be dubbed as ruined by my inability to understand rules one and two. With that, I would also like to add, that Regina would not call that our first date. Regina would roll her eyes at me now if I called that night our first date, because in her book, our first date was not for a while after.

You see, that night, I got too far ahead of myself. Like I mentioned before, I never had a crush prior to Regina. She was my first for everything. When I say everything, I mean, everything. Please do not wince at the fact that I was a senior in college. Just don't. Despite how lame it comes across, I waited for the right person to come along and I will never regret that decision. Anyways, dating or having a crush was something that I was new to and I did not have the memo yet on 'how to sweet-talk a woman.' So by all means do not, I repeat, do not do what I did that night. You will fail miserably and I sincerely hope you have enough brains to back away from the said situation and play it cool, unlike me. Flirt and leave it at that. But do not act on your dirty thoughts swarming in your brain. No matter how good the situation feels, or how well you think the 'outing' is going just don't make any swift moves. They will be anything but swift.

If you do, however, decide to act on those thoughts you will find yourself in a very similar situation as I did. I felt my ship slowly sinking in the Charles River that night and that is exactly why I sat in a bar alone drinking my sympathy beer. While I kicked back at the bar I considered my options. What I had to really take into serious consideration was that I would have to share a lab bench with the girl I just basically attacked with my lips for the remainder of the semester. Worst part was that I wanted more of her lips on my lips. I enjoyed the taste she left behind. How does one even recover from being left in a bar? My pride was taken down a notch. Perhaps it was for the better. Too much pride can be easily seen as arrogance and that is far from attractive. So back to my question before my rambles started, how do I recover from my serious first attempt at impressing my first crush, Regina?

Simple, create a game plan on how to win her over. My first mistake was not following rules one and two, but also not getting to know Regina. My plan, take two steps back, and really try to know her instead of thinking she would be an easy win. Nothing is easy in life and Regina was far from that. Anyone who thought otherwise was an idiot.

* * *

><p>"You did what?" The taller brunette gawked at me, slack jawed, with her hands on her hips. "Emma, what the actual fuck? Do you not remember when I told you to not put out on the first date? I mean, Jesus woman, at least wait till the second date before macking on a girl. You probably terrified her. What if she was not even into women? Was it even an official date? Did you just tease her all night trying to 'assess' (she air quoted) the situation as you tend to do?"<p>

I sat on the corner of my bed like a sad puppy being reprimanded. No, but seriously. If I had a tail it would have been between my legs. Ruby had a point. I 'assess' the situation on just about everything. Also, it wasn't a date. I just lamely asked Regina to hang out.

"God Emma. You will never get laid if you act like this."

"Whoa, Rubes, it wasn't about getting laid. I just wanted to…"

She cut me off, "Just wanted to what? Because right now I am literally about to toss myself out of this window." She pointed to my window that was cracked open bringing in fresh air, 'cause damn it was getting stuffier in here by each fleeting second.

"Look I just thought that if I kissed her we would see fireworks, run off in the sunset, and live happily ever after."

At that Ruby busted out laughing with me. "You are too much of a romantic, Emma Swan. So, I take it we need to figure out a game plan on how to fix this so you have a fighting chance with this girl. What was her name again?"

I smile, "Regina. Regina Mills." I pause, "She's a senior too. She's a little taller than Belle and has mocha colored eyes and the darkest shade of brown hair. It's like coffee."

"Look, I know you worked at that hipster café down the street, but that does not give you any rights to comparing this poor girl's features to coffee." She laughed as did I. I mean, I am pretty corny.

"Whatever. I blew it. She probably will avoid me as if I had Ebola."

Ruby cut her eyes at me, "That's too soon for cracking jokes Ems."

"Fine, the black plague. That happened hundreds of years ago. Is it still too soon?" I threw my hands off my forehead and into the air. I looked juvenile and similar to when I was fifteen and would have a hissy fit when my parents wouldn't let me go out late past curfew.

"No, I guess not. But I think what you need to do is have zero expectations and that way you can be pleasantly surprised when things unfold organically."

I threw myself back on my bed and released the world's longest sigh. This was not going to be easy, since all I had thought about since that kiss was Regina's warm body against mine and her soft lips. I was in deep over my head with Cupid's arrow sticking out of my ass.

* * *

><p>It was finally Friday again and my Irish history class was dragging. They say time stands still when you stare at the clock waiting for the minutes to tick on by. I was nervous. You know how I knew? I was fidgeting and well, besides that, my hands were a little too clammy. I mean it was normal for my hands to be a tad bit clammy. Sucks because when I write I have the blue lines wear off on my hand. When I was 6 and first started school I thought I got a disease and would die from it. I got this icky blue discoloration on my hand. Little did I know, it was just ink transfer from my wide ruled paper. I wasn't the brightest back in the day.<p>

My blonde haired professor, Dr. Delaney, resembled Sarah Paulson. I mean really resembled her. If I squint hard enough they could be sisters. She always wore the most fashionable clothes. In fact, now that I think about it, her style resembles Bette's from The L Word. So essentially, my straight professor, married, with children, reminds me of a bunch of lesbians. Mentally, I laugh at this. Anyways she wrapped the lecture up with instructions for us to finish reading, 'Ireland's Magdalen Laundries and the Nation's Architecture of Containment' by James Smith. As much as I hated this class right now, this topic was of interest to me. I mean, how many people actually know that the Magdalen Laundries existed?

If you do not know, here is a quick ten second history rundown. Irish women and young girls were sometimes perceived as threats to the moral fiber of society. These woman were viewed as promiscuous for having sex before marriage, which defied their religious beliefs. As a result, they were sent to the Magdalen Laundries, a workhouse run by nuns, excuse me, a prison run by creepy mean old virgin looneys. More often than not, the girls sent to this establishment had become pregnant and their children were taken shortly after birth and given up for adoption to families who were unable to bare their own children. Messed up right? Except that is not the real fucked up part of this quick random spat of knowledge. This Catholic run workhouse was shut down in the middle nineties. A few years prior to the workhouses being shut down a real estate developer discovered the bodies of these female inmates. They were burned and buried in unmarked graves on the property in one mass grave. Holy shit, right? Ha, please laugh at the 'holy' pun because this was not 'holy' for it being a Catholic run establishment and this is me attempting to make light of this kill joy topic. Anyways, you're welcome for that quick history lesson on one of the biggest public scandals in Ireland. But seriously my blood boils and I can't actually wait to write the critical analysis paper.

Dr. Delaney continued to remind us that our paper is due, which I knew because I am the world's biggest nerd. "I need an essay that is 5 full pages and single spaced, on Monday, that summarizes the book and its key highlights. I need to know how you think the author approached this topic. Was it objective? I also need you to think about how woman were treated and viewed, as sexual deviants, and why that challenged the status quo in the nineties. Do not copy quotes from the book and insert them directly in the paper to take up space. I will dock points if you do. Just incorporate quotes within the context of the paper. Make sure to follow the instructions in the syllabus on how to properly format the paper. If you need an extra copy of the syllabus because you lost it after the first day of class, it is online. Do not use passive voice or contractions, and write out all dates. If you use passive voice, I will drop you one letter grade. Reflect the history paper writing guidelines I provided on the first day of class. It is your bible this semester, in respect to writing papers worthy of an A."

Half of the class groans because I am sure most of them forgot that the paper was due Monday. Lucky me, I started it earlier in the week. I am now in the final editing stages. I plan to not spend all weekend formatting and editing it. I have a life you know. One that now includes my two best friends and a whole weekend filled with a horror movie marathon. I am partial to the zombie flicks. Ruby loves the werewolves and Belle just hides her face in the crook of Ruby's neck and pulls through like a champ, for the team.

I grab my notebook and head off to chem lab. My heart is pounding in my chest. It's as if I am about to face impending doom and, you know, I am even a tad bit light headed from how nervous I am. You see, I am such a newbie at this. I can't even hide any of this fear. It's written across my forehead, 'nervous train wreck.'

I mentally coach myself. Like Rubes said. Let everything unfold organically. I will play dumb and just do the experiment and leave. I won't even bring up last Friday. Pretend that it never even happened.

I walk into class and all resolve I had was completely diminished as those deep mocha eyes caught mine. Her expression, like last Friday night, was unreadable. But her glare was penetrating me. I smirk and nope. I aroused absolutely no emotion from the standoffish coffee haired girl. I make my way to my desk behind her and watch as Dr. Wolfgang sets up his PowerPoint to address the material to be covered in lab tonight. I pull out my lab book and tap my pencil on the desk impatiently waiting for everyone else to arrive. I mean do you know how frustrating this is? I don't have her number, email, or social media information. I could not even reach out to her and apologize.

"Can you please, for one second, stop your fidgeting Swan. Continue to tap your pencil and I will snap it in half. " Oh man. This was not a good sign at all. Shit. Shit. Shit. Okay, fuck my lucky stars. How am I going to make it three hours with the ice queen? Fuck me, not, but really.

I grumble out, "Sorry."

* * *

><p>The first portion of the class is over and we're now decked out in lab coats, goggles, and latex gloves. Regina was adorable. Her coat was a tad bit too long for her. Mine was about 6 inches above my knees. Normal. Hers was an inch below her knees. I think this is because she was last to get a lab coat from the rack and got stuck with a medium when she clearly was an extra small.<p>

I scamper to collect all of our materials and solutions. I mean I feel like I need to be on my A-game to impress her, you know, given my slip up last week. I fill the beaker and grab all of the pipets. I weigh everything, to get all the initial weights for calculations, while Regina, ever so neatly, created her graphs in her lab book.

"You're doing it wrong. Did you _not _read the pre-lab and the instructions? I refuse to allow you to ruin another one of my Friday nights, due to your lack of literacy."

Nope. Just nope. That was my last straw. This woman has some low blows and snide remarks that could paralyze an unsuspecting victim, but I refuse to play her game.

"Look. I am sorry. For what it's worth. I have no idea what came over me. I've never done that before and I made a mistake. I get that you aren't gay and that must have been highly invasive and now you have to deal with me every week. Forget it ever happened. We don't have to talk about it. We can just come to lab, do the work, and leave." I say, extremely frustrated. I lean over my notebook to avoid any eye contact and use my fingers to block my peripheral as they rest on my temples.

"What makes you think that I'm not gay? Perhaps what was so invasive, is that I just met you and you thought it was acceptable to just man handle me in a bar. Newsflash, girls don't like that. You should know. You are one, Swan. Apparently you lack people skills _and_ the ability to get to know someone. Get your head out of your ass." Double gulp. Are my ears clogged? Did she….did she… wait…she's totally gay. Oh man I really did mess this whole thing up. My head is totally swimming in what I now call a _serious_ dilemma.

For once I am at a loss for words and go through the motions of the lab and make little to no contact with the tiny brunette to my side until we do calculations and our conclusion on our experiment.

"Regina, you have to take the square root and divide by two remember?" She looks at me, that vein is full on and poking out, and says with some strain, "Thanks."

I turn in my assignment and start to clean everything up. She starts to help, "Look, Regina, just go hang out with your friends. I've got this." I turn to the glassware and start to collect it all when she grabs them out of my hands.

"I am your lab partner and this is my responsibility too. The quicker you let me help the sooner we both will be out of here." True to her comment we were out of the lab in ten minutes. Unfortunately that meant we left at the same time and we were forced into that awkward small talk conversation that I attempted to avoid and loathed.

"So I will see you next week Regina. Have a good night." I turn and start to head to the opposite entrance that she is facing when I felt a warm hand on my bicep. I don't turn, or move for that matter. My entire arm tingled where her hand came in contact with my arm. I felt like I had cinder blocks weighing my feet down to prevent me from moving. In my head I kept repeating "let it unfold organically."

"Emma wait." Still not moving. Just so you know, my heart was one beat away from exploding in my chest. But if it did explode I wonder if Regina would be able to help since she's going to be a cardiologist someday.

Going along with the whole cinder block comment, one could also say that 'a cat had my tongue' because I made no efforts to engage her in conversation. I already apologized. I get there is no turning back time to fix my idiotic mistake.

"Uhm." Oh man. She's hesitating. Come on Swan turn around and talk to her. I feel like I am picking up tree trunks for legs as I turn my body to face her.

"What, Regina? Going to yell at me some more and make me feel more like a…"

She cuts me off, "Buffoon."

I smirk internally. Yes a buffoon. "Right. Well I guess I do deserve that. I, again, am sorry. I never meant to make you feel like you were man handled. Like I said, I have never done that before. It was rude and I promise it will never happen again."

She smiled. You guys. She actually effing smiled at me. Score one for Swan. I am back in the game. I am doing some serious mental leaps for joy.

"So anyways, you better get going to meet your friends. I would hate to be the reason you had another terrible Friday night." I turn and speed walk to the exit doors and head home to my love sick roomies.

* * *

><p>The next morning I am in Widener editing the final page of my essay for Irish history sipping on my Starbucks latte. I was not kidding when I said my blood boiled over this topic. Like what the hell. Nuns were always creepy, but now they were up there with clowns in my book. I wonder if there is a horror flick with killer nuns? If so, that should be on our list tonight for our horror movie marathon.<p>

I crank up the volume and put on my beats and listen to my man, Tom Petty. I could listen to him all day long. For instance, if I was deserted on an island, with no inhabitants, I would take his greatest hits album because, hot damn, it was amazeballs.

Damn passive voice. It was the bane of my existence. I wrote my entire last closing paragraph in it.

"Excuse me, is this seat taken?"

I pull off my headphones and without making direct eye contact say, "No."

"Oh, Emma. Hey. You're here early." I would know that voice a mile away. Regina. I almost fell right out of my chair. Smooth Swan. Super smooth. Way to be cool.

"Yeah, I have this paper due on Monday that I am wrapping up." I stretch my arms over my head and pretend to be nonchalant about the whole ordeal of almost falling out of my chair. How humiliating. I am way too clumsy for my own good.

"Oh, what's it on?" Regina inquired.

"The Magdalene Laundries."

"Oh. You have Dr. Delaney for Irish history?

"Did you have her last year?"

"Yeah I took that as an elective to fulfill my humanities requirement. I aced that paper, if you want me to proof read it and make comments? I did very well in her class and know the key highlights she looks for."

What the hell is going on and what happened to the snarky Regina Mills in lab last night? I bite my bottom chapped lip and mull over her offer. She's clearly trying to be my friend so why not? What is the worst that could happen?

"Okay, but I have to reword my entire last paragraph. I mistakenly wrote it in passive voice. Once I am done you can read it?"

"Sounds perfect. I have to do my calculus homework anyways, so take your time."

I sit there staring at my MacBook screen for what feels like an eternity. I mentally kick myself and pray to god that I don't mess this up. This is a golden opportunity to fix what I did last weekend. But, oh my god, her lips. They were a light shade of pink today. She was wearing a plain black tank with high waisted skinnies and animal print flats. How effing cute? Then, you guys, I almost lost it. She pulled black thick framed glasses from her black leather purse and started punching equations into her scientific graphing calculator.

I look down at myself, really Swan. I am wearing a plain red flannel that is super wrinkled with blue jean skinnies and cream high tops. I look like a wreck. Fuck my life.

"Are you almost done with your paper?"

"Uhm, just five minutes and I will be, why are you in a rush? If you have somewhere to be that's okay."

"No, it's just that I am a little famished and need to run to get a salad from the cafeteria in a few. You are welcome to join me?"

What in the world did I do to deserve her being so open to inviting me to lunch? This is amazing. Best Saturday ever! Mental leaps for joy. If even tried this in real life I would fall flat on my face. Trust me. I did it once in high school in the gymnasium. I was imitating the one and only Fred Flintstone and it was just pure shameful trying to pick myself up in front of my fellow classmates.

"Yeah, I could totally go for something to eat, but it will not be a salad. I need something of substance."

"Clearly you worry about your figure and health."

"Awe, don't be like that. I just am starving and I might as well eat it while I am young with my amazing metabolism."

"Touché Swan."

"Okay, so here is my essay. It's super long."

"Don't worry about it." I smile and then realize I could offer to check her calculus.

"Hey want me to check you calculus solutions? I bet a second pair of eyes wouldn't hurt. Besides it will give me something to do while you proof read my masterpiece of an essay."

"You know that would actually be much appreciated. I hate math and I was already debating on getting some extra help."

"Okay then swap me your calculator and math problems and you take my MacBook."

We sat in compatible silence for thirty minutes checking each other's homework.

"I changed a few comma splices. You get comma happy."

Well that was true. I hate commas. I seem to toss them in when it feels right. I once told my English teacher they were added decorations to boring words. My English professor hated me.

"Awesome. Do you think that I accurately assessed the writer and the dynamic between women in Ireland?"

"You did excellent. I can tell you were passionate about the topic." Her eyes catch mine and she warmly smiles at me. We stay like that for a few more longing moments before she interrupts our eye sex, "So my calculus?"

"Right, well numbers 4, 10, 34a, and 42 were incorrect. It was simple mistakes. So I just quickly wrote out the steps on a separate piece of paper for you to follow. If you want we can grab lunch and we can come back here and I can teach them to you so you are better prepared for any upcoming quizzes or tests?"

Regina licked her bottom lip as she studied the notes I made. She sighed and looked at me. "I would really enjoy your help. This is super stressful. I have a test on Wednesday."

"Hey, it's totally not as bad as you think. You make the same operational mistake in each problem. All it you need to do is practice. Simple repetition makes a big difference."

Regina's stomach grumbled. "Why don't we just grab a quick bite to eat and come back? I don't have plans with my roomies till later tonight."

Regina smiles and nods and we pack our stuff up and head to the cafeteria.

* * *

><p>"So Swan. I hope I don't make you uncomfortable by bringing this up…."<p>

Here we go. Shit. Where is my rock to hide underneath?

"But I was wondering what you meant last night? When you said you'd never done this before?"

I wished I could crawl under the table, or use Harry Potter's invisibility cloak and opt out of this conversation and have fled the premises, like a flea. But to my dismay Harry Potter is a fictional character. As is his invisibility cloak. So, of course, my face turns the shade of Rudolph's nose and I squirm under her hungry glare.

"I mean exactly what I said. I have never done this before."

Regina's face contorted slightly and her lips fell into a slight frown. She licked her bottom lip and moved a strand of hair out her face. Her head tilted off to the side as she considered what I said.

Regina then questioned, "Can you elaborate?"

"Look, I just haven't had much experience in dating. I have gone on a few dates, which I did mention. But that is all that ever happened. I dated guys in high school and then when I got into college I kind of had a 'coming to Jesus' and realized that I was actually gay."

"So let me get this straight. You haven't kissed a girl, and/or had sex?"

"Well…technically, I have kissed a girl. You."

"Whoa. Seriously?"

"Okay. I…I am going to go get some extra… bread."

I stand up and rush over to the soup area and start grabbing some French rolls and literally feel my face on fire. This fucking sucks. I wish I was six feet under the Earth. This is exquisite torture. I can feel myself, literally, getting physically nauseous and need a life line. Rubes.

I whip out my iPhone and text my roomie.

**Hey, so, funny story I am eating lunch with Regina and she in essence asked me if I have had sex or anything with chicks. **

I wait and within seconds Rubes responds.

**Let me guess. You ran away like an idiot and are freaking out. Just go with the flow and whatever you do keep your hands and mouth to yourself Ems. The more nervous you act the more obvious it is. Get back over to her and just talk about whatever. **

I can do this. I mentally coach myself.

**Got it. We are going to finish up and go back to the library to work on her homework. **

My heartbeat starts to slow down. I feel less like I am going to pass out like a beached whale in the middle of the cafeteria.

**Damn girl, she already has you on a tight leash. My kind of girl. Bring her around sometime. Maybe movie night tonight?**

I laugh and text back.

**Fat chance Rubes. **

I pull my big girl boxer briefs back on and walk back over to the table we were sharing and sit down.

"Sorry I just really needed this bread. It's the best and I totally recommend it."

"Bread goes straight to the butt, so, no thanks." She continued to chomp away at her rabbit food.

"So what did you do last night if you don't mind me asking?"

She finishes chewing and says, "I met up with my best friend, Kathryn, and my ex, Robin. We all went out to a show at the House of Blues, in Boston. It was a riot. We had floor tickets. I really went just to support them. I have no interest in the band we saw. They got pretty drunk too."

"What show was it?"

"I don't even know the name. It was Robin's favorite though."

"So you are still good friends with your ex?"

"Yes. I mean, well, we weren't at first. He was in love with me and I could not reciprocate those feelings so, for a while, he was hurt.

"I see. So why didn't you share those feelings? I mean, last weekend you mentioned that you kissed someone else while you were dating..."

"I guess, like you, I realized I was into girls when I first got to college."

NO WAY. Remain cool. Don't flinch. Don't breathe. Don't effing move a muscle Swan. Finally, I got my answer. She was totally gay and totally my type. Internally I scream.

"Oh, that's cool."

"Yeah. It was hard at first, as you could imagine, for him. But soon he realized I was not going anywhere and hung around."

We finished up our lunch and headed back to Widener. I got us a study room with a white board and wrote out all of the steps to her homework problems. She seemed to catch on pretty quickly. I decided the best thing to do to help her fully learn what I showed her was to have her do additional problems with similar arithmetic.

I stood at the white board with the blue marker in hand and her textbook in the other as I wrote out a new equation to be solved.

As I wrote out the lengthy problem I could feel her eyes on me. Yup. I knew it. She was checking me out. I casually stretched my arms in the air and scratched my head, mind you my blue marker in hand.

"Emma, you got that marker in your hair."

Damn. See how smooth I am. I frown at the board and respond. "Whatever, it will wash out later while I am in the shower."

To be honest I did not intended on being a tease. I didn't think before I spoke, but nonetheless I turned around and saw a very caught off guard Regina. I couldn't even say anything because the moment I opened my mouth I'd either A) say something equally as teasing, or B) something really fucking stupid.

I reach out my arm and hand her the blue maker and motion for her to do the problems on the board.

A few minutes later, she's completed all of the problems and I use the green marker to check mistakes. Thing is, there were none. Looks like I am a really awesome teacher. Nailed that. Maybe I could be her unofficial tutor?

"Regina, you did great. These are all correct. I think you finally get the steps of operation and arithmetic!"

"Thank you, Emma, for the help. I feel way better about the test on Wednesday, now."

"Hey, if you ever need any extra help, I am always here to help."

"Thanks. I may take you up on that offer."

I go to collect my stuff and then turn to her with a slip of paper, "Mind if I give you my number? That way you can just text me, if you having any issues, and I can head on over and help out?"

She smiled and accepted the small slip of paper. I finally had an in with Regina Mills. We walked out of the library together and parted ways. Later that night, as I was curled up on the couch in my flat with the two lovebirds, who were busy sucking face, my phone lit up. It was Regina.

**Thanks for helping me out today. It was completely random that I ran into you and I am glad that I did. I'd really like it if you were free on Tuesday to help me prepare for my exam.**

It's official my foot is in the door.

**Hey, I can meet you at the library Tuesday at 8 PM?**

My phone lit up seconds later.

**Perfect. See you then Swan. **

* * *

><p><strong>Feedback is always awesome. Reviews feed the writer! ;)<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I own nothing and all errors are my own.**

**A/N: I hope you guys are enjoying college Emma and Regina. Just remember that this is a reflection of their love story as a 5 years older Emma reminisces on how they first fell in love. Think about what would cause her to suddenly want to think back and write it all down 5 years later? ;)**

* * *

><p>I never really understood why Regina was so open to me all of a sudden. I mean, she left me in a bar guys. That's generally a bad sign, right? I assume you are nodding your head, yes. Because if you aren't, shame on you. So…but, then she was a total ice queen in the following lab. You know this. I just literally told you my side of the story. Then, the weird thing was, I just want to throw this out there, that she sat by me in the library. She never had to and she didn't have to invite me to lunch either, but she did.<p>

So what did I do to have all of my stars align to be back in her good graces? This leads me to dating rule number three. Never ever question how things are unfolding. Going back to my good old friend, Ruby. She told me to let it all unfold organically.

Let's be real. You're more than likely a girl, if not totally cool, to each their own. But if you are a girl, you know that you probably tend to over analyze things. I am going to lay out a few examples. One being if you don't get a text back right away, or at all for a day you then instantly worry, 'what did I do wrong' or, if you are like me you convince yourself that you are an idiot. I also used to openly gawk at the tiny device for an hour straight praying to the heavens that a message will come through. If I did not stare at my phone it was glued to my body at all times ready for me to text back. Kind of reminds me of that chick flick 'He's Just Not That Into You.' If you haven't seen it, I highly recommend you watch it with a glass of yummy red wine. That's if you're twenty one, of course. The main plot focuses on a guy who, essentially, gives dating tips to this hopeless romantic. Turns out to be fairly cute and wine makes it a tad bit funnier, only because the girl kind of reminds me of my younger self.

Back to what I was getting at, just do yourself a huge favor and never question things. Because I totally started to question why Regina was, all of a sudden, acting as if the weekend prior did not happen. Besides that quick spat in the lab we had, of course.

Looking back five years later, I know, now, what my wife, Regina, did. She was playing what some girls call, 'hard to get' and was making me work hard for what I wanted. Regina, guys, never in a million years will let me forget that kiss in the bar that night. Her words, "You acted like a buffoon." Again, this is not a normal word to ever be used to label someone as, please refrain. My poor wife, however, never got the memo and I was too lovesick to tell her to stop.

I just rolled my eyes at my own ramblings. Key point is, do not question how things are unfolding. I repeat, do not. Go with the flow of things. You'll find that you make things worse for yourself if you don't and will give yourself stress pimples. Yes, those are real. I stand by that. My forehead that year broke out more than any year of my existence, because of Regina Mills alone. She would argue it was my poor dietary habits.

* * *

><p><strong>Hey, I so there were no open areas for us to study in Widener. I did find a communal study room with a white board in Lamont on the bottom level if you want to come here?<strong>

I waited a few minutes and started pulling out my old notes from calculus from last semester. I made notes on the chapter Regina was studying this morning for us to go over. I really wanted to impress her and if I helped her make a great grade on her test then, I hoped, we could make this a regular thing.

**Awesome, I will be there in five minutes. I'm at Sever finishing up something with Kathryn and Robin. **

I pull out my MacBook and look up Regina on Facebook and debate, should I add her as a friend? I mean why not? I mean I could somewhat get to know her better. Check out her 'about me' and peruse through some of her pictures and see what she's into. I click the 'add friend' button. Facebook is one of the most helpful places on Earth where stalkers alike creep on each other. In fact, I was so addicted one semester that I deactivated it for a year. I had a problem. They need to seriously consider having like an AA for Facebook addicts like FA 'Facebookadditcs Anonymous'. Perhaps I will lead it someday, "Hi, I'm Emma and I am a Facebookaddict." Sounds legit. It would also give me an excuse to munch on some powder donuts and get free coffee. Though, it is safe to assume that the coffee will be cheap Folgers and the donuts will most likely be stale.

I look down at my phone and decide to respond.

**Take your time. I am in no rush**.

I really was in no rush. I was super excited to spend the whole night with Regina. I mean. You guys. If I could include a picture of her I would. She's beautiful. Every little thing. Her hair, as previously mentioned, reminds me of coffee. Her lips were always painted a shade of lust and her eyes were beautiful mocha orbs that always fought to be noticed. Regina's skin looked oh so perfect and soft too. Then she had this tiny little frame. She was perfect in my eyes, just absolutely perfect. Not to mention, she always looked classy. Most girls looked like hippies, or super snobby. She was neither.

I heard someone clear their throat, "Emma this is Robin. I figured since he was also in calculus with me that you could help him out a little too?"

Man. I wish you guys could see my unamused facial expression right now. This sucks. I was looking forward to spending the evening with Regina. Just Regina. I gather my composure and stand up and shake the bloke's hand.

"Hey, I'm Emma."

"Robin. Nice to meet you. Regina, here, says that you are quite the mathematician."

I smile. So she's talked about me. That's a good sign.

Regina's eyes bug out of her head a little, "Robin!" She then playfully knocked his shoulder with the back side of her dainty hand.

"Well, why else would we be here 'Gina?"

"Anyways, Emma. Thanks for meeting me. I hope my plus one doesn't get too annoying for us." She then winked at me. Was this a date? You guys? Wait. Why does she have to always do that thing with her eye? Maybe she has like an eye twitching issue that only happens when I'm around?

"No worries. I did go ahead and make a few notes on the chapter and selected a few problems for you to practice." I handed her the sheets of paper. You could totally see where my hand had smudged some of the blue ink off, from my hands being a little too clammy, because, yes, I Emma Swan was nervous.

"Robin, why don't you slide your chair closer to mine and you can look over my shoulder to see the problems." He did just that. He got super effing close. Wait. One. Second. He put his hand on her leg. This is not cool. I thought she was gay. I mean I thought she was not into him like that. Am I reading this whole thing wrong?

It took every ounce of energy I had to move my eyes away from the pair in front of me. I turned to the board and bit my bottom lip. My face was crimson and I felt my nerves at wits end. This was stupid. This girl was totally messing with me. I gathered up some courage to turn around and confront the two people and turned around. I watched in amazement as Regina picked up Robin's hand and dropped it back in his own lap.

I laugh internally as she looks up and catches my gaze. Her chocolate orbs focus on mine and she smiles warmly at me. When I say she smiles warmly at me, my insides literally feel warm. I get the butterflies fluttering in my stomach and I can not help the muscles on my face as I grin back at her.

I stutter out, "Is.. Is there anything you have questions about yet?"

She shakes her head no in response.

"Well, I am going to just go up to the main level and grab a quick coffee. Do you guys want anything?"

"No, I am good darling."

Robin was English and he used those words of endearment like they were normal here in the states. Weird guy.

"Actually, I really could use a coffee. Mind if I run up with you?"

"Not at all."

Regina and I slip out of the study room and head up the stairs together in unison.

"So, you and Robin take a lot of classes together?"

"Actually no. This is our first one since freshman year. Sorry if he made you uncomfortable a few minutes ago. He sometimes has a lapse in judgment. Sometimes, I wonder if he is still in love with me all these years later. But, you know, I avoid that conversation entirely. No need to reopen old wounds from years past."

"Well, at least you guys can be friends. I mean that's really uncommon."

We enter the small interlibrary café and I go to order my usual blonde coffee. Thank god they had Starbucks and not Peets coffee. That stuff was on the same caliber as battery acid. Okay, maybe that was Coke. As you may be able to tell, I am not the biggest fan. Once I wrote a review on it. It wasn't the most pleasant.

"Can I get a grande blonde coffee with an ice cube?"

Regina piped in, "I will have a tall Americano." She handed over her credit card and turned to me, "I'm buying as a thanks for helping me out. You really did not have to go out of you way."

I smile and shrug. "Not a problem, really. Besides. It seems that you have some insider's knowledge on how to write great papers for Dr. Delaney's class. I got my grade back today online. She apparently is the world's fastest professor that grades papers!"

"Oh, how did you do?"

"I got an A. She made a note that I made the best arguments in the class and I have you to thank for your extra help!"

She smiled as we both reached for our cups of coffee on the bar. "I am glad to hear that you rocked it, Swan. You did write a pretty impressive paper."

"I felt passionate about the topic. It fueled my fingers to type faster."

We both laughed. We turned and headed back down to the bottom level study room and found Robin standing at the white board working some problems as he scratched his head.

Three hours later and Regina was still going. Robin was slumped over his chair snoring.

"Regina, I think you get the gist of the topic. You've practiced 40 problems and I have checked them all. You had one mistake and it was super tricky. But that was the most difficult problem in the chapter and you got one part of it incorrect. You've got this." I was in the middle of this pep talk hoping that it was reaching the brunettes ears. "Just breathe and do not panic. What time is the class?"

"It's at 10:00 am."

"Okay you have two solutions. Study for another two hours, or wake up early tomorrow and go over a few more things and write out your equations on a crib sheet. "

She sighs as she looks down at her notebook and drops her mechanical tan pencil down on the paper.

"You've got this. You will ace the test. What are you worried about?"

The coffee haired girl that sat in front of me sighed a long sigh, again. "I just can't risk getting a B on this. One wrong calculation and I am done for the rest of the semester."

I squat down so that I am eye level with Regina. "Hey. Look you won't get a B. You can do this. You have worked very hard and I believe in you."

She smiled and responded, "Thanks. I think I am just going to head home for the night and wake up early and write my equations out and study that one problem that I made a mistake on. I bet it will be on the exam."

"Sounds perfect." I pack my stuff up as Regina wakes up the sleeping form that was slumped over next to her.

"Robin. Robin." She shook his shoulder, "Time to go home."

The English blue eyed guy was up in seconds.

We were out of the building within in a few moments. Robin darted off in the direction of his apartment leaving Regina and I alone. I am about a good three feet away from her and I kick an imaginary pebble on the ground. I have my back pack slung over one shoulder and I wait for her to say anything. She doesn't so I clear the air with my voice.

"So, uhm, I hope this was helpful. I will catch you around sometime?"

Regina nodded, "Yes. I will see you Friday. Have a good night and congrats on the paper, Emma."

I turn and leave and head home to Rubes and Belle. The two were inseparable. It was suffocating at times. For instance, right now. It can get a little annoying when you walk in and find both, for a lack of better words, naked and fucking on your couch. Like really guys? Sometimes I wish I was blind. Is that bad to wish? I suppose it is. If I was blind I would not have been given the pleasure of seeing Regina. She was a sight for sore eyes.

"You guys are going to be disinfecting the couch as soon as you are done. Did you both forget you had rooms in here? WITH BEDS?" I basically shrieked the last two words out as I sped off to my room down the hall and slam the door. I really do love my roommates. But damn. Some things are meant to be left unseen.

I changed into my baggy old Black Sabbath band tee and put on some tight black Calvin boxers and jumped into my double sized bed.

My iPhone was lying next to me on its own pillow. If you couldn't tell, I worshipped the tiny device. It was my life line at times. For some reason, I got the feeling I should text Regina. So I did.

**Hey. It was nice seeing you tonight, despite the circumstances of studying for an exam. Good luck tomorrow.**

I waited. No response. Fifteen minutes passed and still nothing. Yup. I am an idiot. An hour had long passed. What was I thinking? I finally slid my phone underneath my pillow and went to sleep. I always worry and wonder if I will get brain cancer someday from sleeping with it under my pillow. Perhaps I could sue Apple for not having a warning label, 'keep a distance of 3 inches away from body when not in use.' God help me. I am hopeless.

It was now Thursday, late afternoon, and I had yet to hear back from Regina. It sucks, yes, but what am I to do? I had spent all night on Tuesday twiddling my thumbs waiting on her to respond. Super annoying. I'm annoying. Everything just went so well. Someone slap me. I am head over hills for this girl.

* * *

><p>"Emma?" A fry then hit me smack in the face leaving behind a greasy smudge.<p>

"Rubes. Cut it out. God."

"Sorry, but hey 'Earth to Emma.'" I did space out. As of late, I have become accustomed to spacing out and daydreaming about Regina.

"Sorry Ruby. What did you say?" We were sitting in the cafeteria. We were finished with classes for the day and I had a lot of homework to get to. I had to read a few more articles for Irish history and work on another paper while also preparing for my chem lab.

"I said look alive there is a girl checking you out."

I scrunch my face because really?

"Seriously Ems. Oh Shit. She's coming over here."

Thankfully my back is facing this said person who is checking me out, which gives me an extra few seconds to stop freaking out.

"Hey Swan."

This is not happening. I literally have no make-up on and my hair is stringy. Not to mention I am wearing what I wore yesterday. Wait. She doesn't know that. Breathe.

I turn and look at her. "Hey Regina. How's it going?" See I can be smooth.

"Just grabbing a quick lunch, mind if I join you guys?"

I look over at Ruby who now has finally connected the dots.

"Well actually, I was just about to leave to go meet up with my girlfriend, so you can have my seat."

I slow clap, mentally, for my friend. She totally was not going to go see Belle. She was in lectures for the next two hours. Ruby was a true friend taking one for the team. One could also say this was her repaying me for that incident that happened on my couch Monday night.

Regina slides into Ruby's seat. "So, I got my test back today."

I am quick to respond. I am eager to know if she got an A. "How was it?"

"I got an A. I had all prefect solutions. Dr. Slater had that one problem on the test that I got wrong on Monday night. It was so easy, but you know, it wouldn't have been if you didn't tutor me on Monday."

"That's awesome Regina. I am so proud of you." I then did the most stupid thing ever and actually high-fived her. Yeah I am so lame. It was a total face palm moment. Regina was a champ though and gave me a high-five back, without throwing shade at me and calling me a twelve year old.

"Sorry I didn't text you back the other night. I had fallen asleep early and was super stressed. I went straight to my exam and afterwards, honestly, forgot about it until just now. I feel terrible. But to answer you, yes, it was nice being with you Monday night as well. I was wondering, would you like to make a habit of studying together?"

This is where I realize that I am such a girl and should not have worried about her not getting back to me when I texted her on Monday night. She was asleep. Again, I mentally face palmed at my idiocy. Duh, Swan. Get a grip.

Remember, I've never done this before. I am a newbie and, technically, Regina was my first girl kiss and crush all wrapped up in one. Sucks that she knew that too. Boy, am I in over my head!

"Actually, that's not a bad idea. I have a lot of stuff for Irish History to do tonight, that I could use your expertise on, and then stuff for chem lab."

"Why don't we go over to the library after this and get it all finished?" I nod in response and finish my steak taco.

* * *

><p>"Okay so, Dr. Delaney is pretty easy in general, when it comes to getting through the articles. She will assign 8 at a time to read. You will most likely have a paper where you compare two of them due on Monday."<p>

"Yeah and I suck and haven't even started yet." I grumble. These articles were nowhere near as interesting as the Magdalene Laundries.

"Don't worry. It's super easy. So, here's the thing. I suggest reading only two articles. Pick the two that seem the most interesting that contrast the most. It will be easier to write about and then in class tomorrow she will go over all of the articles and their key highlights. Just take good notes and ask questions. You then won't need to read the other 6 articles."

She looked over my syllabus that outlined the readings and highlighted with an orange highlighter two titles. "These are the ones that I did in case you want to do the same. I can provide insight on the critical analysis as well as proof read everything when you are done."

"Awesome, I will totally do that. Thanks. Wait. Will you be free this weekend to help me on my paper?"

"Yeah. I actually don't have any plans this weekend. Robin has a game and Kathryn is going home to Providence, to see her family for the weekend. Don't worry about our lab running late tomorrow and you ruining my weekend plans." She did giggle at the last part of that, which I am thankful for. Finally, I feel that we have moved past everything from a few weeks ago.

We sat in companionable silence for an hour as I read the two articles and made highlights and comments off to the sides for me to reflect on for when I did write my paper. Regina had pulled out some biology homework and was reading her textbook.

"Regina." I wait for her to look up. She's wearing those adorable thick reading glasses again.

"What?"

"Would you be open to hanging out tomorrow night, after lab?"

She looked at me for a few moments. "Yeah, why not. We could go into Boston. I hear they are having Shakespeare in the park at the commons."

"Sounds good. I would have to go back to the apartment to drop off my back pack and stuff, but I would love to go."

We finished up our chem homework and headed out. The next day flew by quickly and before I knew it Regina and I were on our way to my apartment to drop off my stuff.

"Do you mind if I leave my stuff here as well?"

"That's fine. I probably should have asked you if you wanted to anyways."

I walk up and take the bag off of her shoulder and place it on the floor next to my bed. I grab my coat and we head to Porter to catch the Red Line into Boston. The train for Braintree/Ashmont was 10 minutes late and there were, I kid you not, 200 people on the platform waiting to get on. Of course there is no seating and so Regina and I are sardined into a sweaty car. The train starts to go and I notice Regina has nothing to hold on to so I reach out and hold on to her by the small of her back for support. She doesn't question my actions and I am super thankful. God forbid I screw this up a second time.

Finally we get off at Park Street and we head out into the commons. There were tons of people out for the event. I walk with my hands in my back pockets and smile to myself. I am out with the most gorgeous girl at all of Harvard. Nothing could go wrong, or so I thought.

"Emma?"

I turn and face the small coffee haired girl and notice a similar look to a few weeks prior, one that was unreadable. It was almost like she had a mask on or a fortress built up so high to prevent my inner white knight capabilities from climbing to the top.

"Oh no. I know this face. What's wrong?"

"I just want to be clear about something. This.. (hesitates).. this isn't a date. I just want to hang out and get to know you."

Fuck me. I do this. I confuse just hanging out with it being a potential date. I look up at the night sky. Not a single star for me to wish on. So I have to play it smooth. I have to make her think that I think that this was not a date. In reality, I totally was hoping that it was. I mean, who invites someone they know has a crush on them to Shakespeare in the park?

"Regina. I get that this isn't a date (lies). I do like you, but, if I think that we are compatible in that way I will ask you on a proper date, in the right way. For now, let's enjoy the evening as friends."

Score for Swan for just saving some major face. Who's playing hard to get, now? Huh?

"I think they are doing Macbeth. Why don't we go sit somewhere close so we can see everything up close?"

* * *

><p>It was now midnight and we were just getting back to my apartment. "Regina how far do you live from here?" I could tell she was tired.<p>

"Uhm, I actually live in Brookline. I know it's crazy to live so far away, but my mother owns a house out there and I have it all to myself."

"Regina, that's got to be at least be 40 minutes by T."

"It's fine. I'm used to it. I'll just call a car."

"No. I insist that you just stay here tonight. I'll sleep on the couch out in the living room."

Her mocha eyes looked at mine and she shrugged. I took that as a yes. I opened my closet and pulled out a pair of sleeping pants and a shirt and hand them to her. I grabbed my own set of my usual boxers and my old band tee. I grab a pillow and walk out of the room. "Night, Regina. Holler if you need anything."

The next morning I was up at 9 AM my stupid phone did not charge because I left the charger in the bedroom last night. So I slide across the light hardwood floorboards to my room and peak in. She's still sound asleep. I walk over to the bed and plug my phone in, causing her to wake up.

"Emma?" Her voice was a bit more husky than usual. Damn, it was sexy as hell.

"Hey, I am sorry to wake you up. I just needed to plug my phone into the charger."

She sat up and finally got a full view of me and that is when I realized I was in my Calvin Klein underwear. You guys. I swear that this was not my aim. I did not intend on being a tease. But damn. Her eyes consumed my body. Regina was totally into me. I needed to quickly get out of this room before she did devour me for breakfast.

"I'm going to go make some coffee for us. There is a fresh towel on my chair (I pointed out) and the shower is just down the hall to the left. Also, there is an unopened toothbrush behind the mirror. You can totally call dibs on that." I waste no time slipping out of the room.

I start to fiddle with the coffee maker and then hear Regina step into the shower. I throw an ice cube into my Urban Outfitters angry cat coffee mug and chug it like it's my life source. What the hell was I doing?

* * *

><p><strong>Feedback makes my fingers type faster! ;)<strong>

**Happy Christmas Eve to those who celebrate!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I own nothing and all errors are my own.**

**A/N: Thanks for all the awesome feedback, follows, and favorites! :)**

* * *

><p>When I was twelve, my dad and I went fishing at an old fishing hole right outside of town. I remember wearing these blue jean overalls and a rose pink cap-sleeved shirt underneath with slippery flip flips. Every time I picked up my foot those damn things squeaked. I also had a wild mop of hair with unruly blonde ringlets. My mother once gave me a bowl cut when I was four because she hated all of the tangles I would get. Thank god we found L'oreal Kids no tears shampoo and detangle spray. Otherwise, my school pictures a few years later would have been cringe worthy. I mean they still were pretty terrifying, but they could have been way worse.<p>

I can still remember following my dad through weeds as he carried the red and white cooler and our fishing rods to our undiscovered location. I can still smell the bug spray and sunscreen that soaked into our skin. It's just like yesterday. I was too tiny to carry much, but I did trot along with a little hand held radio babbling along to the lyrics to whatever we picked up. I had no sense of music as a kid, but now I know I was listening to CCR (Creedence Clearwater Revival) and Bad Moon Rising was one of my favorites. I was a total daddy's girl back in those days. We would spend hours just sitting on a ledge with our legs dangling over the water, with not a care in the world. We would come home late, to my mother, all sunburnt and tired from the sun. Those were the best days as a kid. I mean the sunburn hurt, clearly, but that always set in and I turned brown as a nut. But I miss being tiny and being taken on small adventures with my father. Music was a big part of my upbringing and he had the best taste.

My mother also had some great taste. I can still see her in the kitchen, making lunches for me, dancing to Fleetwood Mac. One song in particular sticks out in my mind, Dreams. She would sway her hips and sing along. She would grab the wooden spoon from the utensils jar and use it as a microphone and pretend she was Stevie at a concert performing. I was always her audience alongside my dad. After her four minutes of fame were up, my dad would always grab her in his arms and give her the biggest kiss. I would sit there, in a fit giggling at their grand show of affection, and hide my forest green eyes behind my hands.

Music connected my family in ways that I can't describe. My parents grew up in the era of classic rock so that was all I was ever exposed to. I mean of course I rebelled in high school and listened to My Chemical Romance and Avril Lavigne. But, at the end of the day, their music became old news and I came to my senses. You may be wondering where I am going with this? Well when dating someone you should always make sure they have good musical taste, or one that is similar to yours. I value music. As much as I was falling for Regina in college, she had to pass a test to see if we were actually compatible. Compatible in music, but also in other avenues. Did we like the same music, movies, or activities?

Rule number four, make sure the person you like is actually compatible with you. A lot of people get caught up in the physical attraction and forget you must also have a rock solid emotional connection as well.

Most college students, like myself, tend to go to the library with the intention on actually doing work. But most, including myself, get distracted and surf the internet and end up doing nothing for the first hour, roughly. Today was one of those days. I had my music blaring in my ears and I was tapping my pencil to the beat of the music. My feet were also dancing away and my head was swaying to the melody.

"I see the bad moon arising.

I see trouble on the way.

I see earthquakes and lightnin'.

I see those bad times today.

Don't go around tonight,

Well it's bound to take your life,

There's a bad moon on the rise."

Beats are great head phones. Shout out to Dr. Dre. Best investment with my summer tips from the café. Beats really do cancel the sound out, but the one downfall is that they make it easy for anyone to scare the bajeezus out of you. Yes, BAJEEZUS. There should be some disclaimer. I mean, I wonder how many people have been killed before from having the living shit scared right out of them?

Here I am enjoying some good ol' CCR and then the next thing I know I fling all of my stuff in the air, which includes my pencil that is now a flying projectile. Terribly dangerous.

Poor Regina stopped said flying projectile.

"Holy shit, Regina. Are you okay?"

Of course, I am that nervous wreck that scurries to my feet after stabbing a girl I have a crush on in the face, I repeat, face with my pencil. Good going, Swan. Just real smooth. Damn you, beats. As you can tell this is a love/hate relationship in this given moment.

Regina stands there with her hand covering her face. "Really Swan, must you listen to that music so loud? You could poke someone's eye out." She laughs, removing her hand from her face, completely fine.

I am so unamused. She totally played me. Damn that woman. She totally got off from my panicked state. If I didn't know better, I'd think she was the devil.

"Seriously, Regina, I thought I hurt you." I brought my hand to her chin and checked for any scratches. Fortunately, there were none.

"I'm fine, but you were really into that music. What were you listening to?"

"CCR." I eye her closely, because god help me if she does not know that band. My heart rate will flat line because all bets will be off.

"I love that band. Have you heard of, The Edgar Winter Group? Free Ride is one of my favorites."

"YES! I love that band and that song is one of their biggest hits. Do you like Kansas, Carry on Wayward Son?"

Then, you guys, she did the cutest thing I have ever seen. She busted out singing the main chorus!

"Carry on my wayward son,

For there'll be peace when you are done

Lay your weary head to rest

Don't you cry no more"

My mouth is hanging open and I stare at the beautiful anomaly in front of me because, sweet baby Jesus, girls like this are not supposed to exist. This is too perfect.

Regina giggles and bites that sweet crimson bottom lip. We, for a few moments, forgot we were in the library and got shushed by fellow students, who were actually doing their work.

We sat down next to one another to finish conversing over our music interest from bands like, Pure Prairie League to even Metallica. Regina Mills was a fan of classic rock and that was my kind of girl.

We both sported matching smiles as we complimented each other's music taste. She was perfect. She was that girl next door that everyone wanted, but I pray to god that I can have her to myself someday.

"So, let's see your calculus homework? You mentioned that you were now working on differential calculus, right?" Regina nods while she shuffles in her back pack and pulls out her notebook and textbook.

"Great. Well, for starters, differentiation is the process to find the derivative of the given function. Sounds wordy I know, but it deals with real function, limits, continuity and differentiability, differentiation, tangents, normal, and other application of derivatives." I pull out a piece of plain white paper and grab a few different pen colors and write at the top, 'The derivative of a function at any point x = a is the slope of the tangent to the curve y = f (x), at the point (a, f (a)).' We continue to go over problems back to back for an hour and then I spend the last thirty minutes checking and helping Regina set up her problems.

Math sucked. I was great at it, but it was boring. Suddenly though, math meant a whole different thing to me, because of Regina.

"Thanks for the help Emma. I will finish the last five problems later at home on my own and will text/ call you if I have questions. How did the paper you were working on turn out?"

"Well I took your advice and did write on the same two articles that you did. They were completely different and were much easier to write a critical analysis on. I think I nailed my point. Would you mind reading it over for passive voice and grammar?"

Regina smiled and gestured for me to hand over my laptop to edit my paper. She pulled out her reading glasses and sat there hunched over my MacBook re-wording a few of my sentences.

She looked up at me, "Okay, see this sentence here. You need to start it off with a noun, followed by the verb, and then use the second noun here." She was pointing her perfectly manicured nail at the sentence.

"If you just remember to give the sentence the focal point in the beginning you, usually, will not be in passive voice. You only had three sentences in passive voice, so that's better than what you did last week with the whole last page. I also noticed you had a few comma splices. Maybe I will send you an article later on the do's and don'ts of commas. They can be tricky, but if you learn the proper usage you won't have any problems."

"Sounds legit. I think I get the passive voice now. How about my actual argument, was it strong?"

"You were right, you nailed it. I think this paper is better than mine even." I smiled at her compliment.

"So I just have to read over the chemistry lab and do the pre-lab. Want to get together later this week and do that closer to class? I just feel like I'm being pulled in too many directions right now."

"Yeah, sure. It's not top priority. Besides, I think this lab is really easy. I read that we will be pipetting a solution. Though, it will take all of class to do."

"Oh joy. This lab will be a fun sponge."

"A what?" She laughs.

"Fun sponge. You know, a sponge soaks up water. So, I'm insinuating that the fun is being soaked up." I laugh. Because, duh.

"I have never heard that before. You are a unique person, Emma Swan."

"Gee, thanks Regina. I hope that's not a bad thing."

"Nope, not at all. I like it." We stare at one another for a few minutes and then she breaks the silence.

"I skipped breakfast, would you like to get lunch?"

"I would love to, but I promised Ruby and Belle that I would meet them at Tasty Burger to get lunch."

Regina frowns.

"But, hey. I would love for you to come. You met Ruby briefly, but Belle you have yet to meet." I try to sound super inviting because I would really be happy if she joined me.

"Okay, why not. But Tasty Burger, really? Do you know how much _grease_ is in those nasty heart attacks waiting to happen?"

"Easy tiger. Next time we get lunch you can drag me into Sweet Greens, if that makes you happy." I wink at her and she smiles warmly back at me, causing my insides to soften.

Of course lunch was filled with Ruby asking Regina twenty questions on her life. I felt like this was like a double date, and in my book I would call it that, since I paid for the meal. But, I had promised Regina that I would ask her out properly once I think we are compatible, or if we think we are compatible. She did say she wanted me to get to know her.

"What's your favorite color?"

"Purple."

"Favorite movie?"

"Hard, but _Almost Famous_, _Pretty Woman_, _Forrest Gump_, and _What Dreams May Come_."

I nearly choked on my beefy double cheeseburger because my favorite movies are _What Dreams May Come_ and _Almost Famous_. What are the chances in that happening? Ruby, you minx. She was up to no good, playing matchmaker.

"You know Emma's favorite movies are _What Dreams May Come_ and _Almost Famous_?"

Regina smiled at me from the side, "No, she did not tell me that. Small world."

"Favorite place you've traveled to?"

"States or world?"

"Both?"

"Utah and Spain."

"Why Utah, that's like in the middle of nowhere where the Mormons all marry each other."

"Polygamy isn't practiced like that anymore and I used to go hiking at Zion there. I love it more than the Grand Canyon. There were a lot of fun volcanoes and lava tubes that I explored too."

"Interesting. So you like nature?" Ruby smirked her red lips at me with a wink.

"Yup. I first went there as a kid for camp, to get away from my suffocating mother. Later, as I got older, I was the camp counselor. Sounds super geeky, but I led the horseback riding lessons through trails for the kids and taught them how to ride. I had fun playing out in the Wild West."

Ruby went to ask another question and was patiently stopped by Belle. "Honey, I think you have interrogated the poor girl enough. Regina, I am so sorry. And shame on you, Emma, for letting Ruby ask so many questions. It's terribly rude."

I hold up my hands in mock surrender. "Hey! I had nothing to do with that. If Regina was uncomfortable she could have stopped at any point. Right 'Gina?"

Regina turned to me, "So, I have a nickname now?"

I slyly smile at her, whoops. I've been calling her that in my head since Robin called her that. "I thought people normally called you that.

"Actually, only Robin calls me that. I hated that nickname. I think he was so used to calling me other pet names, that when we broke up 'Gina' was the only one left that was acceptable."

"Oh, well I could always use other names too?" I wink. She smiles and turns back to the two lovebirds holding hands across from us.

Regina sees their linked hands and smiles, "So how long have you guys been together?"

"Well, Belle would say since sophomore year, but I would go with freshman year."

"Whoa that's a big time jump. Why's that?"

Belle interjected, "Well Ruby here was following me around for a year like a lovesick puppy. She took me on dates and we kissed a few times. But, it wasn't till after the summer that we really made it an official commitment."

"Like the little lady said, I took her on dates and we, basically, were exclusive. We just didn't put a label on anything till our second year."

"I see. Well you guys seem really happy. I envy that."

Oh no. Ruby, keep that blood red mouth of yours shut.

"Well you could be happy too, if you gave it a whirl with Emma."

No. No. No. Why did she have to do that? I wince and my face for once is not the color of Dorothy's ruby red slippers. Instead it's green like the wicked witch. I physically felt the double cheeseburger make its way back up my intestines. I swiftly slide out of my chair and dash off to the one-stall bathroom and lock the door.

I need to take a lesson in playing it cool still. I mean, I'm learning but I am nervous 24/7 around Regina. I could roast Ruby with a pineapple in her mouth right now, over an open fire. I did not sign up for public humiliation when I agreed to lunch this morning. Jesus effing Christ.

I heard a knock on the door, "Just a minute."

"It's me." Can I not get a break? This could only get worse.

"I'll be out in a minute Regina."

I stare at my reflection in the mirror, wipe off the mascara that was running down my face, and splash my face with cold water. I feel disgusting and just want to go home and sleep.

I open the door to the bathroom and there Regina is. "Ruby and Belle left."

Thank god. I don't know how Belle dates Ruby sometimes. I love that girl, but damn, she was like a bad headache the morning after too many tequila shots.

"Thank god. I don't know how much more I could have taken from her."

"Don't sweat it. So, I think I am going to head home too. Tomorrow night I am getting dinner with Kathryn. I was wondering if you wanted to join?"

I feel like we are dating. I am going mental.

"Yeah sure. I would like to meet her." I smile.

Later that night I notice Regina added me on Facebook. I wasted a good hour going through her pictures while listening to the Rolling Stones and Steppenwolf on shuffle.

There were pictures from her time out west, in the land of the clay rich soil. An entire album on equestrian, as well. Regina had a beautiful black stallion and in every other picture she was holding a trophy, or a blue ribbon. She must have been the real deal back then.

Of course I also stumbled upon those embarrassing senior prom pictures. Except she looked beautiful, in a pale blush dress that hugged her tiny frame in all the right places. It really made her dark features pop.

I need help. I turned off my Mac and flipped on my TV falling asleep watching reruns of The Fresh Prince, a true classic.

* * *

><p>"Regina tells me that you are in her chem lab with Dr. Wolfgang. I had him last year. He's a strange old man." Said the doe eyed blonde in front of me.<p>

"Yeah, he's alright. I don't have anything to complain about."

Regina added, "He is really by the books though. I got a point docked from my lab last week for my table being ordered not the way he wanted."

"I didn't know that. Why didn't you tell me?"

"What would you have done, Emma? Go up and say, "Don't take points away from my lab partners report just because her recorded and calculated value columns were swapped?" She said in a high pitched whinny voice, mockingly. I pray, to whatever higher being exists, that I don't actually sound mousey.

"What if I did?"

"I would call you a buffoon."

I roll my eyes because of course she would. I have no doubt.

"Emma, so what do you do for fun?"

"Uhm, well I spend a lot of time studying. If I am not doing school work, I am with my two best friends, Ruby and Belle."

"Have any hobbies?"

"I suppose. I like to write. I have journals going back to the beginning of when I could write. I love music, so I collect old vinyl records. I get that a lot of people are doing that now, but I listened to music on the record player with my dad since I was a kid. He refused to get rid of his old record player when CDs and MP3s became the norm. I also jog a lot. I was on my schools track team. I just grab my iPod and daze off while running. I could run for days. It's rejuvenating."

"I should have figured you loved to write. Your essays are always so good. I mean, disregarding you active comma usage."

"Hey I'm learning okay, besides you did just send me that article on comma usage and I read it over. I'll give my next essay another go and let you be the judge on any improvements. If I fail to improve, then you'll just have to reprimand me." I joke.

"Yeah, I am pretty tough. So I wouldn't, if I were you, want me to punish you." She evilly glares.

My breath catches in the back of my throat because, of course, if there was any way I could take that comment and make it sexual, I did. I'm thinking with my vagina, not my brain. Way to go, Swan.

* * *

><p>By Friday, Dr. Wolfgang was walking around the lab, in his squeaky loafers, monitoring the Four-fold Serial Dilution experiments. Today he looked like he had cleaned up well. His cinder colored beard had been trimmed and his shirt was tucked in. This is a sign of progress. Maybe he finally was at a point in his life where he was accepting his divorce?<p>

"My hand is getting tired of pipetting. Do you mind if we switch?" Regina bit her bottom lip trying to gage my response.

"Regina, you don't even need to ask. Slide on over." We still had an agonizingly long hour left. Serial dilution is the most annoying, yet easy, lab. Since the lab took as long as it did, we only had two questions. The last one, "Calculate the concentration of substance in each tube (four in total) if the colored solution's concentration was 1879 mg/dl?"

"Regina, why don't you set up the problem and I will punch in the numbers and get the answer. You try it and see if you get the same answer." Look at me, always trying to tutor her math skills.

Regina takes a few minutes to work everything out and I then look over her shoulder and see that her solution is right.

"Regina, that's perfect." I smile.

"I can't believe I did it right." We clean up everything and hand in our experiments and head out of the lab.

"What are you doing tonight?" Regina asked.

"Uhm, well, I have a date." I wish I could have captured Regina's face on camera. Her lips that were curved in a smile turned to a frown in zero to two seconds flat.

"What?" Her vein on her forehead was terrifying. Perhaps it was a bad joke. I internally cringed and accepted it was a bad joke.

"…. A date with Netflix."

"Emma Swan." She slapped my arm. My, my, was that possessive. Mentally noted and filed away in my mental file cabinet labeled, 'Regina Mills.'

"What? I have the flat to myself and figured I would lay around in my boxers and binge watch a few movies."

"I see. I thought you were actually going on a date-date."

"Nope. But you are welcome to join my date with my Netflix account. "

"Uhm." Regina looked like she was caught in a mental debate.

"You don't have to. If being in my Calvins make you nervous I can leave my pants on." I wink.

"I will come over, only, if we get to watch a movie of my choosing. And by all means, don't let me being around change your lounging habits."

* * *

><p>"Can you just pick something?" We both are sitting Indian style at the foot of my bed as I scroll through all of the options.<p>

"I'm sorry, but picking a good movie takes time and searching."

"Oh my god, Emma. I am going to fall asleep."

"Oh come on. Don't be like that. How does _Pay it Forward_ sound?"

"No I will cry. It's too sad."

"Fine, _Good Will Hunting_?" That perked Regina right up.

"That's a really good one. I haven't seen it in ages!"

"Want me to go make some popcorn too?"

"Yes, but don't make it extra salty or anything." I lean in to her and get as close as I can to her face and my eyes zero in on her lips. Her breath catches and I can see the rise and fall of her chest. I refuse to mess this up so instead of falling captive to my feelings I stand up and walk out of the room and into the kitchen and pop some good Orville Redenbacher movie theater buttery popcorn.

"Some of its burnt Emma."

I see her holding a crispy piece in her fingers and lean my mouth forward and eat it. I smile and moan at the charcoal goodness.

"Fun fact, I love burnt popcorn. Feel free to give them to me if you find anymore."

"That is disgusting. I can't believe you like that. It tastes terrible."

"Whatever, just think, you don't have to eat them. I will for you."

We continue to watch the movie, "Hey, you kind of look like Minnie Driver." I point out.

"No I don't. She has freckles."

"Oh whatever, Regina. You both resemble one another. Doesn't mean you look exactly like her. Besides, see how drop dead sexy she is? My kind of girl." I continue eating fist fulls of popcorn, ignoring the fact that Regina is staring at me and is not folding. She would do well in Vegas at the poker tables with that unreadable expression she often wore.

I turn and look at her, "What?"

"You just, basically, called me sexy." She deadpanned.

"Yeah, so?"

Then just like in the movies everything went silent. The movie was still going, but it was tuned out. In that moment I can only focus on Regina. I had tunnel vision, in a sense. I just could not divert my eyes.

Her beautiful mocha eyes were fastened on mine. She licked her bottom lip and she started to move forward towards me.

My body moved on autopilot, as if it already knew what it wanted, and my hand brushed her cheek. I am only just inches from her face and I gently tuck a dark strand of hair behind her ear.

I lick my dry lips and say, "Regina, you do know how beautiful you are, right? You are stunning. I can't take my eyes off of you sometimes. It doesn't matter if you're happy, sad, or raging angry at me. I find you to be exceptionally beautiful."

Regina moved forward and closed the extra distance that separated us. Our lips crashed into one another's and we sat there, moving at a slow pace, soaking up every second. Her lips explored mine as our tongues did that dance that lover's tongues do, all night long. It was nice to finally be able to revel in each other's lips. Her lips were incredibly sweet, and God was she soft too, and not only her lips, but her skin. She felt like silk underneath the palms of my hands. At some point, my hands slipped right under her shirt and felt her warm, bare, unexposed flesh. Regina Mills was going to be the death of me. Because, I, Emma Swan, felt my pulse quicken and my body temperature increase.

Things got even more sensual when Regina straddled my hips and had her delicate hands buried deep in my blonde stringy hair, massaging my scalp. I slowly kissed down her neck, across her pulse point, and stopped. I felt myself freeze up because I knew where this was leading and I was not ready for that.

Breathlessly I said, "Regina. I… I…."

She understood. She could see what I wanted to say so badly, but didn't have the courage to. I did not want to ruin the moment, or our potential together.

"We don't have to do anything else. Kissing you is perfect enough for me." We smiled at one another. God was she the most beautiful creature I had ever seen.

* * *

><p>That was our first kiss. My wife, Regina, would deny that our real first kiss ever happened in that bar, at the start of the semester. One of her favorite memories was that night in my bed. You know, I did it all wrong in the beginning. With hard work, I did fix things by letting everything naturally unfold and I learned to go with the flow. That made our first real kiss sensational and more meaningful. We laid in my bed all night in each other's arms lip locked and completely infatuated with one another. There is nothing I would change about that night. The level of intimacy had skyrocketed between us and, from that point on, things would never be the same.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>Feedback greatly appreciated! <strong>


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. Happy reading! **

**A/N: I also have a great beta now, JuniperMorgan. She's amazing and very helpful. **

* * *

><p>In my freshman year of college I wrote a paper for my psychology class with a professor named Dr. Ross. Dr. Ross was one of those professors who was married to the school. Well, not really married to the school just married to the other Dr. Ross. They both dressed like they still were living in the 70s with bad hair, clothing with too many wild patterns, and big binocular glasses. I am not exaggerating. Those things were windshields covering half of their face. I wonder if they were worried of running into any insects on the way to lecture.<p>

If you squinted they even looked almost identical, both Dr. Ross and Dr. Ross, that is. They do say that sometimes when you are married that you and your spouse look similar. Think about that one. Creepy, I know. Regina and I look nothing alike, so that's relieving. Anyways, part of our lecture focused on chemical reactions of neurotransmitters. We were allowed to choose one topic we covered in class to further research and I decided to examine the relationship between neurotransmitters and what chemicals are involved when someone falls in love. Believe it or not it's quite scientific.

You see, I grew up with parents that were positively soul mates. Yes, soul mates, who were completely in love with one another. They were the kind of soul mates that would die and be reincarnated only to meet again in a different life, like in the movie _What Dreams May Come_. Spoiler, _whoops_.

I mean come on, my mother died of a broken heart when my dad died. It was hard. I mean, I was a kid. Eighteen. I could understand that their love was so intense that they couldn't be without one another. But, I wanted to know chemical reactions with respect to love, so my paper's thesis centered on identifying the process with supported evidence to prove that, yes chemically you can pin point increased levels of chemicals in the brain that prove that being in love is a real thing.

This paper was something I needed. I was at a standstill for a while and needed to understand scientifically what love did to the human brain. For some time after my parent's death I felt lost. I was left behind and I desperately needed clarity over why? How could love be that strong? I figured if I dug deeper into the science of love and found answers to my questions that I could be at peace with the world again.

My paper was adequately titled, because professors made you do that in college, The Chemistry of Love. I explained that love has three components to it: lust, attraction, and attachment. Based on my research I found that each of those three components have variable chemicals and hormones that have an effect on the human brain one cell to another.

Lust is driven by the sex hormone oestrogen and testosterone in both females and males.

Attraction is when you feel like cupid shoved that not-so-cute arrow up your ass. You get super love-sick. Three neurotransmitters are involved when feeling love-sick: adrenaline, dopamine, and serotonin.

You know when you start to sweat a little or your heart flutters? You may find yourself saying, 'She gave me butterflies.' That is adrenaline. You essentially have heightened blood levels of adrenalin and cortisol. Dopamine is like cocaine to the human brain. It causes an extreme amount of pleasure. I mean extreme!

Then you know how when you finally meet 'the one' you constantly think about her. For me, when it came to Regina, I always pictured her biting her juicy bottom lip or how contagious her laugh was. She would invade my dreams. She would pop up in my mind in the middle of a boring lecture or when I was out jogging on a cold day in the dead of winter. She was everywhere. That, that's when you know you've become obsessed with someone. Serotonin levels are surging in your brain giving you this rose tinted view of the person you are longing for. One thing is for damn sure, I will never stop seeing my Regina the way I did the first day I ever laid my eyes on her. She is by far the most beautiful human being my eyes have ever graced.

Ever wonder how you will stick it out with someone when they are old and saggy? Well in the honeymoon phase you also build an attachment to the person you are seeing that contributes to you longing for them and in a sense connects you emotionally long-term. It has been hypothesized that the two hormones involved are oxytocin and vasopressin.

Fun fact the hormone oxytocin is released when your significant other, or whatever you are into, brings you to the edge of an orgasm. This is also the same hormone that drives you to cuddle, which most couples do after they pass out after having their mind blown. At least that's what happens to me and it also deepens your emotional attachment to the person you are with, like Regina and I did.

Lastly, vasopressin is what really solidifies the long-term commitment with the person you're in love with and is like oxytocin in that it is released after sex.

I can't believe I actually condensed that to a couple hundred words when I wrote this paper in college it was eight thousand words. But those eight thousand words were what led me to find a sense of oneness with the universe again. My parents passing was a life defining moment. I had to learn to let go of two people I loved more than anything in the world. They taught me what real love was. I could never just openly give something so delicate to another person.

That night in my room when I was wrapped in Regina's arms melting as she kissed my thin lips I knew I was falling madly, deeply, in love with her. I was afraid because, after four long years of losing my parents, I was learning to allow myself to open up to love again. All of those neurotransmitters in my brain were increased and I was on cloud 9.

Rule of dating number five, don't forget to open up your heart. Sometimes you get so caught up in the messy web of things that you actually forget to allow yourself to feel all of the exhilarating emotions. You are chemically wired to feel love. When it comes knocking, open the door. I was finally able to allow myself to unwind and open myself up to the possibility of love, for the first time. Not just any love. The only love of my life, Regina.

It wasn't easy, being so open, at first and this is where I tell you I shut down and pushed Regina away. I know, you must be thinking I am an idiot, or a 'buffoon.' I was, but love has a funny way of working sometimes.

* * *

><p>Damn these orange plastic chairs. They were too cramped and feel like they were meant for middle school students. I sat in the back of the room waiting for Dr. Wolfgang to show up. Here I was starring off into space patiently waiting to get this lab over with. I felt like everything was annoying me, since last Friday. And to add to my current frustration, I look like I just rolled out of bed. Today I was wearing my, 'Wish You Were Here,' Pink Floyd band tee. Let me specify, it's the one with the guy on fire not the prism with a rainbow. The prism is way over done these days. Anyways, my shirt was wrinkled and smelled sour.<p>

You know when you accidently forget you had laundry in the dryer and then two days later go to grab everything out only to find that they never fully dried? Total, "what the fuck" moment. That happened to me and I do not regret yelling those words out at the sky like someone was going to answer me. I was low on quarters so I couldn't run my laundry again. What's a girl to do? At the very least I did spray Gain Febreeze on it. To add to my roll out of bed image, my hair was in a ratty ponytail and my blonde highlights accentuated the dark circles under my eyes from late nights spent watching too much Netflix. I was what Ruby calls, "a walking tragedy."

Dr. Wolfgang finally showed up and started his routine of cleaning his glasses and fidgeting with his laptop connector. From my observation, this guy was definitely OCD always repeating himself. He had a system and God forbid it be interrupted, or changed.

I sat far off, in the back corner, while I patiently waited for lab to begin. I was already anxious enough and then my phone buzzed. It had been going off like this for days.

I checked my lite up screen. It was Ruby. Thank God.

**Hey chica, date with some popcorn tonight? Belle is working late and we can watch some more of those unsolved murder mystery shows. **

Recently, Ruby and I had been staying up late to watch the show _Disappeared _on Netflix. It was terrifyingly amazing. Don't get me wrong, murder is bad. Very bad. But it's interesting to learn about how crime scenes can be left with zero evidence. Back in the day when I watched CSI: Las Vegas with my mom it led me to believe that you would basically need to be wearing one of those CDC suits that covered your entire body. I mean you wouldn't want to leave DNA like skin cells, hair, or a finger print. God forbid you leave a finger print (On second thought, I guess it's a good thing killers leave those). Some of these crimes, though, were unbelievable and hard to believe the killer was able to leave little to no evidence. My personal opinion is that serial killers are borderline geniuses and/or, at the very least, more intelligent than your average Joe. Don't worry. I don't need a psych evaluation. I am not planning anyone's murder. I just find the forensics and all the scientific testing intriguing.

My phone started to buzz again. Ruby literally sometimes would text me eight times in a row. Patience is virtue.

But this message wasn't from Ruby, instead it was from Regina. My pulse picked up instantly. Little beads of sweat formed on my forehead and I stared at my phone. It's been almost a week. One whole week. I have ignored every text, call, and message from her.

**Emma, please talk to me.**

My phone buzzed again.

**I don't understand why you are ignoring me. Please get coffee with me, so we can talk?**

To be honest, I don't even understand what's going on myself. All I know is that my body is on a high right now and I'm afraid of what that means. It's too much. I remember one moment I woke up curled around Regina, basking in her warmth and the sweet smell of her hair, and the next I'm up and out of the apartment altogether.

Later that night, when I got home, she was gone. I ran. I'm an idiot and I ran. There was no coming back from that. It's this constant push and pull with me and the mistakes I keep making with Regina, are borderline unforgiveable. Why she was still trying to contact me was beyond me.

Dr. Wolfgang cut my thoughts off, "Ms. Swan. If you don't mind please put your phone on silent. It's distracting me." Of course it's distracting him (I mentally note, Dr. Wolfgang is OCD).

"Sorry. I didn't meant to bother you." I go into my settings and turn off the vibration. Later I would kick myself for this. I commonly lose my phone and make Ruby or Belle call me. Normally it's on silent with vibration. Now I will lose it and there will be no vibration. Fantastic.

Dr. Wolfgang had a classic Bostonian dialect. You can always tell when someone was a native to the area, they pronounce their 'R's' like 'Ah.' The common saying, Park the Car at Harvard Yard in a Bostonian dialect is, Pahk the Cah At Hahvad Yahd. I dare you to read that out loud. Here is a fun one, when Bostonian's pronounce their 'O's' they are more like "ahh" ('Boston' becomes Bahhhst-inn). Want to hear a famous person talk with a Bostonian accent? Google President Kennedy and that is what my professor, Dr. Wolfgang sounds like. Total old school and very endearing.

So, you may be asking yourself why I find myself sitting waiting for lab and Regina isn't here. Well, it is 2 PM on a Thursday. I opted to take lab a day early with Dr. Wolfgang. I emailed him to change labs for the day claiming that I would be out of town for a family gathering. I laugh bitterly, because I have no family to 'gather' with.

Still, looking at my phone I bit my blistered bottom lip trying to think of what I could say to Regina, "No, I don't want to get coffee with you." Or, "No, sorry I am busy…forever." Then what about, "Sorry, can't." I can't tell her any of that because of course I wanted to see her. I had thought about her constantly since last Friday night. She was perfect and everything was breathtaking, but here I sit in this lame orange plastic chair a day early, just to avoid her. This is a new all-time low.

"Emma, since you are taking this lab today instead of tomorrow you will have to work with an existing group. I trust that you will be in next Friday's lab. You have your first practical and I suggest you start studying with.. er.. Regina, your lab partner. It's not an easy exam. The class usually averages in the C- range. Consider this a fair warning."

I sigh mentally. This was going to be an exhausting next few weeks while the first set of mid-terms happened. "I will be in next Friday's lab and will connect with Regina on the lab practical. Thanks for letting me come today instead of tomorrow. I realize that it can be inconvenient."

The meek old man smiled at me, "No worries Emma."

* * *

><p>I was sitting on my living room couch next to Ruby watching the series <em>Disappeared<em> on Netflix when her next text came in.

**Where are you? Lab starts soon.**

I silenced my phone. It was Friday at 6 PM. I never was late, or missed lab for that matter. For all Regina knew, something terrible could have happened to me.

I realize how mean it is to not respond, but what the hell do I actually say over a text? "I'm avoiding you."

I put my phone on the coffee table and turn back to the TV. This episode was about the sixteen year old girl, Molly Bish. She was killed in Massachusetts in 2000 (that's not scary-given where I live, mentally hides face under blanket). Molly was a lifeguard at a lake in the summer. Her mother, Magi Bish, would drop her off for work. The day before Molly went missing, a man in a white sedan watched Molly go off to her lifeguard stand. Molly's mother waited until the man left. The next day he was gone, but Molly went missing. The only evidence left was Molly's first aid kit opened suggesting that she had attempted to help someone potentially injured. In 2003 Molly Bish's remains and blue onesie swimsuit were found by a hunter, but the case was never solved. Is your skin crawling? Crime TV is great until you are home alone. This week Ruby and I have scared each other, walking in and out of rooms, left and right.

My phone buzzed again. This time Ruby jumped, throwing the popcorn across the room.

"EMMA?" Ruby freaked.

I cringe a little, "Sorry Rubes." I look at the lite screen and see it's Regina, again.

**Answer me. **

I winced. She's making it difficult to avoid her. I mean what am I to say, 'Yeah, took lab yesterday to avoid having to see you.' That would sound real practical. It was mean, but on the flip side it was also mean to not answer her. Yet, I turned my phone off (for Ruby's sake) and continued to watch the big plasma TV.

Ruby clicked the TV off and turned to face me.

"Emma, what's got you down?" I look over at my best friend, her worried brown eyes latched on to my green ones searching for an answer.

"Nothing. It's nothing." I fidgeted with the soft patch worked blanket that covered my legs. My mom bought it on consignment years before her death. It was made of old flour bags. It was colorful and I could get lost in it for days looking at the different patterns. It reminded me of her every time I curled up underneath it.

Ruby sat up and looked closer at me, "Emma, it's clearly not nothing. Something has you torn up inside. Anyone could see that. What happened? Does this have to do with Regina? Did you two have a fight?"

I look at Rubes. She was in black leggings and a baggy gray colored tunic tee-shirt. Probably one of the very few times I have seen her fully clothed. Her hair was in a messy up-do and her eyes had just a little eyeliner on the top lid to make her eyes pop.

"We made out last Friday." I blurted out. Ruby's eye's enlarged as she took in my confession. Instead of asking questions back to back she let me ramble on.

"She came home with me after lab. We watched a Netflix movie together. You know how I am sometimes, I spent five years considering the different options. It almost put her to sleep, so I turned on a classic, Good Will Hunting. I made us popcorn and then sometime after eating the greasy white junk food we kissed. It was perfect. She even straddled my lap. I think…"

I start to feel weird. My eyes started to burn from the salty sensation of tears starting to build behind my eyelids. I look down at my sock covered feet and try to hide my face. For some ungodly reason I felt fifteen again.

I cleared my throat, "It was perfect and romantic. She was, for a lack of a better word, caring. It kind of happened in slow motion. And then, I panicked. I felt my body grow stiff and it was so embarrassing. I wasn't ready to really go any further with her, intimately, you know? What if she isn't the one and I just can't waste…"

I was cut off (finally), "Emma, honey, it's okay. I get that you're inexperienced in that area. It's really not that big a deal. You have to allow yourself to open up your heart to Regina in order to know if she is 'the one' (she air quoted). Until you do that, you'll never know who you're meant to be with. So tell me, what else happened?"

"I told her I wasn't ready. She was really sweet about it and said she understood and that kissing was perfect enough. That's as far as we went, but we kissed each other all night long. I felt like there was so much emotion behind it all and it was overwhelming. I felt too much too quickly, so when I woke up wrapped around her tiny frame I ran. I grabbed my clothes from the night before and left and didn't come back for a while. By the time I did get back, she was gone. I had missed calls, and text messages, asking where I was and if I was okay. I just could not bring myself to text her back. It's pathetic I know, but I really messed up. I've avoided her all week and even took yesterday's lab and didn't tell her I wouldn't be there today. I don't know what to do. I am so overwhelmed and I really care about her and, I just suck." I threw my hands in the air and slapped my lap in one fluid motion. I leaned over my legs and propped my head on my hands and fixated on the colorful quilt. It was helping me to not hyperventilate.

"Emma, it's okay. If Regina is still texting you that is a good sign. I am sure she's concerned and wants clarity over what happened between the two of you and to know that you guys are alright. I think you need to reach out to her. To just tell her that you are fine and that you'll see her next lab, at the very least. Think about if the role was reversed. How would you feel if the person you had feelings for fell off the map and wouldn't respond to you? You would feel pretty shitty, right?" Ruby nodded her head.

I nodded in response. I wiped the fresh salty tears from my eyes, "I think I'm just going to go to sleep. I have to be up early to study for a few exams next week. I will be at the library, hall of doom, if you need me tomorrow. I think I may also go into Boston for a few hours to have some alone time and hit up a few thrift stores for some used records." I stand up and grab my blanket and head off to my room.

In the distance I hear, "Night Emma."

* * *

><p>I was on latte numero due when I relaxed into the back of my chair. I was bored and my mind kept going back to Regina. I missed her. I wanted to be with her and kiss her lustful lips and wrap my hands around her small form. I was torturing myself.<p>

I pulled up her Facebook page on my Macbook and began to see if there were any recent posts, or updates.

There was a status update yesterday night at 10:30 PM:

**Worst week ever and now I am stuck studying for exams at Widener all weekend. **

I blink several times realizing that Regina is in Widener, probably studying for exams, where I currently am. Great. Last thing I need is to 'bump' into her. I start to pack up my things to relocate to a local café to study. The last thing I needed was to have to awkwardly have to explain myself.

I turn and there I am face to face with the person I worked so hard to dodge, Regina.

I look at her beautiful brown eyes. They were so eager and were searching for some sort of response from my own.

"Emma?" She reached her hand to touch my bicep and my skin instantly tingled at the sensation.

I panicked and all I wanted to do was disappear, "I've got to go." I rushed by her and out the door before she was given a chance to berate me with questions.

* * *

><p>I have come to the conclusion that I, Emma Swan, am crazy. I can't, for the life of me, find any other possible explanation for my actions. Of course I have what Ruby calls, 'single girl anxiety,' but I literally ran from Regina, in front of Regina. It was cowardly. My mother is most likely rolling over in her grave if she knows I treated someone like that. Joy.<p>

I start flipping through a pile of records. Unlike most record stores this one has the vinyl's listed alphabetically, which means I have to physically look through each one to find the ones I wanted. It was annoying, though everything is annoying me so I really shouldn't complain.

The one thing that I love about record stores is the atmosphere. There's always good music playing, faintly, in the background and by good music I do not mean Miley Cyrus. The store generally is a bit grungy. If you are an owner of a record store you should basically know that grunge is a requirement when decorating. They were always staffed with burnt out old rocker dudes or rocker chicks trying to 'hang in there'. They were always the best though.

"Can I help you find anything?" A middle aged guy with male pattern baldness asked me. I turned to look at him and mentally laugh at his Metallica metal tee.

"Nah, I am just looking. I wanted to find some old stuff like Boston or Kansas (In case you forgot, Kansas was a band Regina asked me if I liked).

"Those are very popular these days. Kids keep coming in looking for the old stuff. Bands like that, back in the 90's, never sold. Now they're the most popular records. It's hard to keep them in stock. But, if we had either, it would be in the 'new arrivals' (he air quoted) section at the front of the store."

I smile, "Thanks." I walk over and sift through the dusty old record covers. Some have really great artwork on them. I have been known to buy a cheap record just because it had cool art. To my dismay, there was no Boston or Kansas. I cashed out and walked out with Steppenwolf, the Doobie Brothers, and A Prairie Home Companion Greatest Hits albums. I hit a small goldmine despite not finding what I wanted.

My stomach was turning. I needed food. I walked over to Copley, a local favorite food truck, and ordered some Chicken and Rice guys, and ate at a bench overlooking people. People watching was one of my favorite past times. I love seeing how people function in public. This one lady just picked her wedgie. That was certainly classy (sarcasm).

My mind drifted back to Regina. Finally, I had a moment to think about what I needed to do. Clearly the ball was in my court and I did want to see her again. I have no idea what is wrong with me. I'm a nutcase. Regina did not deserve me flaking so hardcore on her. It wasn't fair and I guess this kind of goes back to a) I have never dated before and b) well, same as a, there was no b. It sounded better in my head to have a second option. But regardless, I'm very inexperienced. I, however, do know enough to know what love is supposed to be like. Hell, my parents were, by Webster's definition, (if there is one) in love.

Regina deserved to know my reservations. One being that I haven't done this before. Which she knew. I probably owed her more of an explanation on why, as well.

Just then my eyes caught this kid face plant by the Public Library trying to skate board down the steps. That looked painful (I laugh internally, I will be a terrible parent someday).

* * *

><p>I tread up the steps to my apartment and slip my bronze key in the lock and open the door. Sitting on my couch was none other than Regina (biggest 'oh shit' moment).<p>

"Ruby let me in." Regina said in a hushed tone. Her voice was deeper than usual and her outfit was lazily thrown together. Her hair was half up and her make-up was smudged by her eyes. She had been crying.

I can't run now. I swallow a huge gulp and try to find my words, "Regina,… I.." She stood up and walked over to me. She was in front of me standing eye to eye with me.

"Ruby talked to me, but I want to hear what you have to say Emma. You can trust me." I look her in the eyes and I can tell that she's being honest with me.

I turn and slip off my converse sneakers and motion for her to follow me to my room. I shrug off my coat and put my back pack in the corner. I pull out my new records and stack them on top of the others. I turn to face Regina, who is now on my bed, and say, "I'm sorry."

She smiles at me, "I know you are." I sit down next to her and pick up her hand. I rub smooth slow circles on the back of her hand. She begins again, "Want to tell me what's going on? Because I swear to God, Swan, if you ever do this to me again there will not be a second chance."

I laugh, there's that little kick of spice she has, "Well, I guess I don't really know where to start, but you know that I've never done this before. I feel like I have what Ruby calls, 'single girl anxieties' (I air quote). I like you a lot, Regina, and that made me nervous. I've never felt like this before and I've only ever experienced love in one form, and that was from my parents. They were so in love and I got to see them write their own love story. It was perfect. And I saw the way they used to look at each other and… that's how I'm looking at you, right now. I know it's crazy. It's only been a little while, but if you want an honest answer, I feel too much too soon and it's terrifying me."

Kind of like a magnet Regina's mouth found mine in a wet sloppy kiss. Her hands dove into my hair and she brought her lips close to my ear and whispered, "If I was to be honest, I feel an intense yearning for you. I can't get you out of my head, Emma." She leaned closer to me leaving her face a few inches from my own. "Kiss me," she breathlessly whispered.

I did as she asked and kissed her. I kissed her on her naked lips, cheek, neck, and her soft ear. I kissed her all night long while my Spotify played faintly in the background to 'An Indie Love Affair' playlist. It was surreal. I knew, in that moment, that I was falling in love with Regina Mills.

* * *

><p><strong>This chapter had a little less humor and more angst. I hope you guys enjoyed it. Feedback greatly appreciated! <strong>


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. **

**A/N: This chapter is my shortest, but I hope you still like it.**

* * *

><p>Ever wonder what it's like to jump around in space on the Moon? Just what it would be like to feel no gravity weighing you down? To feel weightless, almost, floating along into a great big open wonder. Nothing but stars staring back out at you. But then, back to reality, Earth, well, gravity it's a bitch and you aren't weightless. You can still gaze at the stars, just, from a different landing spot. You see gravity pulls you in and it locks you securely to prevent you from literally falling off the face of the Earth. Gravity for a lack of better describing is Earth's version of a security blanket. Wraps you up tight and holds you close. The feeling of free fall however, has always fascinated me.<p>

When I was seventeen I convinced my parents that I wanted to go skydiving. I wanted to feel free fall. I wanted to feel that rush, the sudden fear, and the weightlessness. It took weeks of begging. Pleading even. I was just about to give up when I was assigned my AP physics term project, on free fall. It was fate, or destiny. Actually, I'm not sure which. Anyways, I told my parents about the term project and that it made even more sense to skydive (free fall). I even made a PowerPoint that listed off the benefits of me skydiving for my project with what I hoped to achieve. You should have seen their unamused expressionless faces as I used my hand held clicker to move to the last slide. It looked bad for me. My skills of persuasion were growing weak and boy was I slowly starting to feel the impending dread of the word, no.

But to my dismay, my dad said yes. My mother's face was priceless. There was a catch however. He said I could only go if I convinced my mother to join. My same mother who is afraid of heights. So, essentially, it was a no.

Weeks had passed at that point and it was my senior spring break. I slugged around our tiny apartment mopping, having long forgotten about skydiving, when my parents walked into the house dressed in workout clothes. I remember raising my eyebrow at them wondering, 'what the hell, now they are workout buddies?' No, no, they did not jump into one of those couple's work out classes, instead they looked at me in my pajamas and told me to go throw some workout clothes on too. So, I did and we took a long drive into the middle of nowhere. My forehead was pressed against the cold glass window as we drove on deserted roads that meandered around the forest trees. Maine was a majestic place to be. The car slowed and a large sign came into view.

I can't tell you how blindsided I was when we pulled up to, Skydive New England. I literally could not believe my eyes. I remember squealing like a girl as we pulled up to park the car. My parents told me they were doing it with me. A 'special' family occasion, they had called it.

Before we skydived I logged all of the valuable information down on a loose leaf piece of paper for my project. Within the hour we were in the plane, my mom, dad, and I were all attached to an experience jumper. My dad went first out of the plane, ever so brave. Then my mother seconds after him. Those two were so inseparable. Then. Then… It was my turn. I hesitated. I had this moment of fear, but before I knew it I took that leap of faith and followed after my lovebird parents.

If it wasn't for the air rushing by me I would have sworn I was floating. It was quiet and yet loud as gravity pulled my body back to Earth. It was one of the best experiences of my life. It was by far the best Spring Break, totally better than that one time they sent me to Discovery Camp, tough beat.

Some important guy, Albert Einstein, once said, "All love stories are tales of beginnings. When we talk about falling in love, we go to the beginning, to pinpoint that moment of free fall." Smart guy, that Albert Einstein. But he's right. We go to the beginning were we can distinguish the single moment in time where it all began. I started to free fall into a love so quickly with Regina Mills. It reminded me of feeling a sense of weightlessness when I skydived with my parents when I was seventeen. So freeing.

Time ran together during that last semester of college. If it wasn't studying together, we were making out and stealing kisses in stairwells, study rooms, or my apartment. I lost all sense of control over what my body wanted. I just know my hands and lips gravitated to Regina.

It may come as a shocker to you, but I never asked Regina on a first date. I know you may think I am exceptionally lame, but I was fresh to dating and never really knew the proper etiquette to asking a girl out. I was still incredibly nervous and, hey, sometimes I could feel my body shaking as I kissed Regina. Oh boy, was I so naïve back then.

Our first real date, Regina would claim, would be over our senior spring break. We took a small getaway to the lake house on the cape that belonged to her parents.

* * *

><p>My lips were swollen from a thousand sweet, rough, and tender kisses. I could feel my heart racing as I leaned in for more kisses that I lusted after. Regina's mouth collided with mine in such sweet synchronicity it was breathtaking. It was movie-esque. Something you would see in a movie theater.<p>

You couldn't even use a knife to cut the tension in the room. It was deafening. But, it was Regina's sweet sultry voice that oozed with passion that danced into my ears as she breathlessly asked, "Emma, come away with me." It was all I could hear in between our pants. All other sounds were voided. Everything in the world was tuned out as my mind raced to comprehend her hopeful words. I looked up into her mocha orbs that held kept back secrets and embodied love.

I leaned in again and gently stole a sweet kiss followed with, "I would go anywhere to be with you, Regina."

It was true. I would follow her to hell and back. At least, so far, she had given me no indication that I would actually have to follow her there, because hey that would be a weird and terrifying experience if I had to. When I was a kid I watched the movie, _Little Nicky,_ if you have not seen that, then shame on you it's a great laugh. But, if you have, you know the man with boobs on his head? Yeah, I bet that got your attention, but I actually thought those creatures existed in Hell. Strange, strange movie, yet humoring.

"Where do you have in mind going?" I asked as I leaned in to kiss her swollen lips.

"My parents own a lake house on the Cape that I thought we could go to before spring break ends on Monday. It's really quiet out there and we could have a little fun."

"When do you want to go?" It was now Wednesday and half of spring break was gone.

"We could leave tomorrow morning, if you aren't opposed to waking up early?"

"I think I can manage waking up a little early to spend time with you." I winked.

* * *

><p>Later that night after Regina left I was in my room packing my aged brown leather duffle bag, that once belonged to my mother, with items for the weekend with Ruby's 'help'.<p>

"Oh my god, Emma. Do not pack that." Ruby reached into the duffle and pulled out my underwear.

"What? It's just my boxers?" I questioned. "I mean hello, these are just my white and black Calvins. They are awesome, and hot? They are hot right? Don't answer that."

"Dude, this is a romantic getaway. Get your head in the game. You need to wear sexy underwear. Not your basics. You need to woo her."

"Ruby….. Do you think this is a getaway to have sex? Because I don't know if I can do that just yet."

Ruby rolled her eyes and fell back on to my bed with a loud sigh. "Emma. You guys are going to do it at some point. It's inevitable. She likes you and you like her. You guys are practically obsessed with each other. I really think you just need to relax and just let things unfold. Sex is not that big of a deal. I mean it is, but it's not. Like yes, you should have sex with someone you have feelings for, but it's just freeing. You feel free after. It's just amazing and I have no idea how you are this old and about to graduate college a virgin. I feel for you, dude."

"Okay, first, I want to have sex. But as much as I do like her I don't know. I am too nervous of doing something wrong. "

"Well, 'Nervy Emma,' pack hot undies just in case. You may just want to wear them as an element of surprise. No one says you have to have sex, but at least have a little fun while you shack up in a scenic lake house all alone."

So I did, I packed some lace underwear with my boxers (just in case). My phone buzzed and I looked at the lit up screen.

**Can't wait to see you tomorrow. **

I smiled.

"Oh my god you guys are so gross and in love, I can't even right now. I am going to sleep. Have a good weekend and don't do anything I wouldn't do, which gives you endless opportunities." She winked and her brown hair streaked with red floated in the air as she strutted out of my room leaving behind a spicy scent.

**I will see you at 8 at South Station. Have a good night's sleep beautiful. **

My heart pounded. I was 'Nervy Emma.' I literally have no idea what I am about to get myself into with Regina and it was exhilarating and yet, at the same time, I was terrified.

* * *

><p>My alarm shocked me out of my sleep at 7 AM. I had a restless night. I could not get Regina out of my head and all I wanted was some reassurance that it was all going to be okay and that there was no pressure. What if we had sex and I sucked and she never wanted to see me again? Like this is a serious concern of mine. I could make it or break it. All the more reason to wait a little before so I can soak up all of what was Regina Mills. You know, enjoy everything before a shit storm consumes me.<p>

By 10 AM I dropped my brown leather bag in a large room with big open windows. The queen-sized bed was dressed with white linens with two accent pillows I kicked off my chucks and laid down. My restless night seriously hitting me like a brick wall.

"Hey, are you going to sleep? We just got here."

"I know, I just need twenty minutes. I didn't sleep well last night." Regina sat down next to me pushing a blonde strand behind my ear.

"Just twenty minutes. I have some plans for us."

Regina slid off the bed and out of the room and sleep claimed me.

* * *

><p><em>Her lips drifted down my neck as she sucked on my pale bare flesh. Our bodies molded perfectly as we moved in unison in the white sheets. My hands moved down the sides of her warm body as I lifted up her top over her head. Regina's revealed heated olive skin sparkled under the natural lighting of the room from outside the windows. She was breathtaking. My eyes were glued to her skin as I mesmerized every freckle and every scar. I wanted to remember every imperfection that made her perfectly beautiful in my eyes. <em>

_I sat up and kissed up her abdomen. Her mocha eyes turned the color of obsidian as my hands reached her peaks. My heart raced and my hands ghosted her skin as they ascended higher to pull one black bra strap down off the side of her shoulder where my lips met the curve of her neck. My fingers reveled in slow circles on her bare flesh as I worked to pull the other strip down. Her skin was like silk beneath the pads of my fingers. Our lips danced together as our tongues found each other's in desperate attempts to taste one another. Before I could continue pulling off Regina's bra my own tee-shirt was brought over my head and discarded somewhere. It could have been tossed in a black hole for all I knew._

_I sat underneath the olive skin toned woman whose dark eyes traced down my body and consumed my defined torso. Regina's tongue licked her lips and her eyes glazed over as if she was about to devour a prey. Her hands reached behind her own back as I heard her fiddle with the catch of her bra and before I could blink she exposed her own flesh. Her eyes twinkled with lust as she leaned down over me and assaulted my neck with her teeth, tongue, and lips. She moved lower sliding the material of my bra to the side allowing herself to consume me with her wet lips. _

_She sat me up and removed my bra. Bare. I was bare. Exposed and vulnerable. Her lust filled eyes glistened with passion and affection as she reached her hands forward cupping my cheeks. She crashed our lips together in a heated frantic kiss. Pulling back her eyes narrowed to mine, "You are gorgeous."_

_"__Emma…"_

_I held on to those words. She called me gorgeous. _

_"__Emma…."_

_I felt my body shaking a little. _

_"__Emma…"_

_There was a slight pressure and I was caught staring at those beautiful dark orbs. _

_"__Emma, wake up." _

Just like that I was pulled from my sleep. Pulled away from those deep obsidian eyes and that beautiful olive skin that sparkled in the natural light. I licked my pale dry lips. My entire body was tense with want, with a need that was voided, my heart so desperately wanted more. I looked up at the beautiful mocha eyes that were so familiar, my Regina.

"Hey, how long was I out for?"

"I let you sleep a little longer. You looked really tired. You started to make some noises when I woke you up. It's only been about 45 minutes."

"So that means it's lunch time. Do you have food here, or do we need to go get some things?"

"My parents have food here. They come here often so there are lots of options."

I stretched my arms above my head and yawned. There in front of me was the same Regina I dreamed about. That was the first dream like that I had ever had. I was falling so hard in love with Regina. But did she love me too? Had she slept with other people? Was I one of many? These were questions I really wanted answered. But at the same time I was afraid of the answers. I was afraid to hear that she was with many others before me. More experienced.

My thoughts were interrupted by the coffee haired brunette.

"We can eat outside, by the lake, if you want. It's nice out."

The lake house was a beautiful glass enclosure encased by a wooden porch. It was unique and definitely not a house you would normally see. The landscape, too, was whimsical with two weeping willows whose long green vines danced in the warm breeze.

I lay on my back under the willow. My hands dusted the crumbs off my face that were left over from our lunch. Regina's back was to me as she looked out over small ripples in the water. It was peaceful. But my thoughts were clouded with questions. I wanted desperately to know more about her. I gathered up all sense of courage that I had and found it better than any other time to simply ask.

"Regina, can I ask you a question?" Her hair pirouetted around her shoulder as she turned to study my expression. God was she beautiful. The breeze picked up a few of her strands allowing them to float in the air. The sun really made the coffee highlights in her hair stand out.

"Of course dear, what's on your mind?"

"I was just curious. We have never really talked about you and your dating life. You know that you were the first kiss I ever had. What about you?"

Regina smiled endearingly at me.

"Well I haven't had any serious relationships, besides Robin. I've met people at bars before and made out, had a few fun nights with them at home, but nothing serious."

"I see." I look away. So she's had some one-night stands. Whatever. That's normal for college students.

"Emma?"

I look back at Regina's hopeful eyes. "I just, I'm nervous about things. I figured you should know."

"There is no reason to be nervous. Trust me. I like you a lot and, in fact, I can't see myself with anyone else. At least, not now."

* * *

><p>Dinner's dishes were now washed and dried. I reached to hang up a pot above the stove on a curved hook when my arm instantly cramped. I dropped the ceramic dish on top of the granite counter top making a huge scene. How embarrassing.<p>

I grabbed my arm and tried to work out the stupid cramp. Of course, Regina was around the corner in a heartbeat, "What's wrong, what did you do?"

"I just got a really bad cramp in my arm. Don't worry about it." I cautioned.

"No, come here I can work it out for you." Regina motioned.

Her hands slipped under the collar of my shirt as she massaged the tense muscles. It hurt like a bitch.

"You should consider eating more bananas or adding some potassium to your diet."

"I hate bananas. They look too phallic and are too mushy for my liking."

"Are you seriously not going to eat a banana because of its shape?"

"I added that it was mushy. Consistency is important."

"You are so strange, Swan. Your muscle cramps seem to be loosened up. You should take a warm bath to help relax it. I think it would help a lot. I think I even have some bath bombs somewhere." Regina trailed off as she walked to the bedroom. I followed behind her. She was squatted down.

"I have one left. You should totally use it."

"No, Regina. I can't use your bath bomb."

"I insist, dear. You'll enjoy it."

"No, really, normal water is just fine for me."

"Humor me."

"What is a bath bomb anyways? Will something explode? Sounds dangerous."

"You've never heard of a bath bomb?" She gawked, mouth agape.

"See, all the more reason for you to enjoy it, not me. I've never even heard of them." I pointed out.

"Fine. Why don't we come to a compromise? We can share it. Together." She deadpanned.

Regina turned on the faucet to the big porcelain tub and walked out of the room. Moments later she returned with big plush white towels that she dropped on the counter. She tested the water and then turned to me, "Well? Are you going to get in?"

I confusingly looked at the feisty mocha eyed girl. She pulled her top over her head. Then I realized (ohhhhhh), it is clear where this is heading. Duh. I am such a blonde sometimes.

"Regina?" She turned and looked at me.

She stepped closer to me, right in my personal space and grabbed my shirt and pulled it over my head.

"Emma, just relax. You are too tense." She kissed my lips and then made her way down my neck. Slowly, like my dream, but in reverse, she slid the straps of my bra down. This was about to get super interesting.

* * *

><p><strong>TBC...<strong>


End file.
